Nils' Pils: A Poor Man's Guide To Spendy Beer

Notable Moments in 2010 Beer Drinking

2010-07-25T17:31:00.003-05:00

And almost a week has passed, but in that week I tried 14 new beers! By far my biggest week of the year fell, not coincidentally, on the same week as my beeriest uncle's visit. Fresh from a five-week high school Europe tour (his eighth running?), I was psyched to score a Cantillon Rose de Gambrinus, as well as a couple classic Cali IPAs. Not to be outdone, my Uncle Mike on my mom's side brought nine Thai beers back with him on his latest return trip; he lives in Thailand. Being known as the beer guy has its perks: I've accepted beer gifts from traveling friends, generous preschool parents and various extended family members. The beer crowd is generally a giving one. Now, if only I could land some presents from breweries, distributors, liquor stores...

Some other highlights of the year so far:

KBS.

My favorite beer of 2010 has undoubtedly been Founders Kentucky Breakfast Stout. I had a 2008 bottle resting in my basement, and when beer spending ceased, those beers I'd been saving became fair game. It's hard to believe I'd gone this long without having this stout of midwest legend, but sometimes it's worth keeping some prize beers untried as long as you can. Luckily, there are so many thousands of pot-of-gold beers, I'll be able to spend my lifetime following rainbows.

The KBS was a perfect stout; better, in my opinion, than its Midwest counterparts Surly Darkness and Bells Expedition Stout, and even better, I thought, than Deschutes The Abyss. Of course, I didn't try these back-to-back. You'd be in trouble if you did. But I was licking my lips after every KBS sip, drumming on the kitchen counter with excitement, in the middle of one of those rare, perfect beer drinking moments. Motor oil black, with a rich, boozy blast of coffee, oak, vanilla and bourbon. The flavor sequence is magnificent: the roasted coffee up front, a sweet toffee vanilla coating as you're swallowing, and that oak-ey bourbon burn after it goes down. I loved the throat burn and nasal sting, and though it packed all these flavors, it was amazingly mellow, earthy and smooth. The only flawless beer I've had this year.

Beer in the hospital

We were told on our hospital tour that nurses had heard of people celebrating with beers in the delivery room, but had never seen it...She advised us that if we wanted to do it, do it with caution. No, I didn't ask about this in front of the entire tour group. She brought it up unprovoked. What, you think I can't go a night without a beer? Well, I went two nights, I think, but when we were told we'd be spending a couple more nights in that tiny, uncomfortable room, I could make it no longer. In came the beer, smuggled between bags of Funyuns and takeout dinner. First came Two Brothers Moaten, which I mentioned previously, then Harviestoun Old Dubh 12. The nurses were clueless, and I didn't mind drinking them out of Styrofoam cups.

St. Paul Summer Beer Fest

I won a pair of tickets to the June festival, held in St. Paul's Midway Stadium parking lot, and it's lucky I didn't realize they were VIP tickets until we picked them up ten minutes before the gates opened for the general public. Had I known we could have access to all those beers an hour early, I would have been a hurtin' individual the next morning. With a pace like the one I displayed that afternoon, an extra hour of drinking would have been devastating. Overall, I enjoyed the experience, though I was less than thrilled with the available samples. Somewhere in between a major geek fest (See: Firkin Fest) and a get wasted drunk fest (See: City Pages Beer Fest), this festival had a good enough number of breweries, 70+, but very few offered anything you couldn't find easily on any liquor store shelf or in house draught list. With that said, I managed to sample 32 new beers, and though I don't count them officially, I get a handle on the beers I'd like to try and those I'd like to avoid. The day's best: Surly Bourbon Aged Brown Eye and Great Lakes Nosferatu, both exceptions to the mass availability rule.

Six Months-a-Drinkin'

2010-07-13T19:45:00.003-05:00

About time, don't you think?

Flash back to early 2010, when I felt lamely inspired by Julie and Julia to re-dedicate myself to my beer blog. I would take pictures! Expand my content! Have some goal-oriented project! And then, Kristie was put on bedrest. Money got tighter, housework piled up and I felt guilty--not just because I could drink and she couldn't, but because every time I went out, I knew she was home watching a rerun of Gilmore Girls and popping contraction-stopping pills. Blogging about beer was far from my mind.

But wait, there's more. We eventually had a child, in early March: you know, this pregnancy thing is finite and the end product is much more time-consuming than the journey. Show me a man who's increased his craft beer drinking after having a child, and I'll show you a negligent father.

Don't be daft, now. I kept drinking beer, and drinking good beer. I just drank at a much more relaxed pace, and often settled for 12-pack samplers (usually underwhelming) or 6-pack staples (usually IPAs). I bought virtually no bottles large in size, price or reputation. I dipped into my under-developed basement reserves. I skipped many tantalizing tastings, events and festivals. Times were a bit desperate, but you can't keep a man from his beer. With that in mind, here's a brief recap of the last half year of my drinking endeavors.

In the first six months of the year, I tried 92 new beers. That may seem like a big number, but it doesn't compare to 2008 or '09, when at this point of the year I'd enjoyed more beers than days. Still, those I tried were the tastiest, on average, of any year's beers since I started keeping track. Though I've only given one beer the full five stars (I'll touch on that later), more than a third of those I've rated I considered better than average on a craft beer scale. Translation: Budweiser, on my scale, is not an average beer. Budweiser is a one-star at best. I consider an average craft beer to be 3.5 stars on a scale that accounts for those skunkiest of skunk. It makes sense to me. Anyway, 37 of 92 garnered four or more stars, and another 20 checked in at the 'average' 3.5-star level.

OK, this is getting far too nerdy. I'm a stats guy, what can I say. So, in the early months of the year, many of those above average beers fell roughly under the Flemish/Flanders Red Ale category. New Belgium's La Folie calls itself a Sour Brown ale, but who am I to argue with Beer Advocate. A bold sour smell, like the one La Folie has, is the only invitation I need, and the dry, chalky finish is a crisp and refreshing way to subdue the potent sourness that dominates the tongue. Maybe the wordiest sentence I've ever written. Soon after, I tried Ommegang's Flemish offering, Rouge, at the Blue Nile and had a Flemish classic on tap at the Muddy Pig: Rodenbach Grand Cru. Without question, the end of winter meant the rise of the Flemish Red. These three are universally sour, and that is a pretty quick turnoff for some. I, on the other hand, can't get enough of them. I always tell people trying them for the first time that they must suspend their idea of what a 'beer' is, and enjoy what they're tasting on its own merits.

I had been saving a bottle of Westvleteren 8 for a special occasion, and there are none more special than the birth of a child, so it was soon after we returned home with her that I cracked it. I must say, I wasn't as blown away as I hoped I would be. Perhaps this was a case of me pumping a beer up so high that it had no chance of meeting my expectations. Reputation often dampens enjoyment, unfortunately. It was still great. It wasn't, however, the first beer I had as a father. That honor went to Two Brothers Moaten, another Flemish red, and a collaboration between the Illinois brewery and Urthel, a respected Belgian brewery. Like the Westy, expectations set by the three outstanding reds gave Moaten no chance to live up to its honor as the celebratory fatherhood brew. This time, it was more the case of Moaten being a below average beer, rather than one over-hyped into submission.

So, I've taken you into mid-March, and my unplanned and lengthy introduction is forcing me to split my mid-year recap into several posts. Hopefully, it'll be fewer days before my next post than it was months since my last.

The Best of 2009: #1

2010-02-08T13:11:00.004-06:00

AleSmith IPA

Brewery: AleSmith, San Diego, California

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 7.25%

Rating: 5 stars

Since I've let these rankings drag well into 2010, the motivation to write extensive reviews is lacking. I've also been spending mucho tiempo preparing for imminent child birth, caring for my bed-resting wife and getting another blog up and running.

I'll give you a little background on where this one came from, though. We were in Phoenix in early December for a wedding, and I wanted to pick up a sampling of high-class West Coast brews we can't get here in the Great White North. I bought about a dozen bombers, including Deschutes The Abyss, Port Brewing Wipeout IPA, Lost Coast Indica IPA and Left Coast Hop Juice. Our free drinking time in Arizona was limited, so I had to smuggle five of them back in my airplane luggage. All five made it successfully.

So there I was, in my kitchen a few days later, with a tulip glass and a giant bottle of AleSmith IPA. This was very exciting. Simply put, it was the perfect IPA. Floral and lively, bitter and sticky, potent but drinkable. And fairly cheap!

If I was a Californian, though my IPA options would be massive, I'd find it difficult to make a pass through a beer store without grabbing one. Or more. I guess I don't have anything more to say.

The Best of 2009: #2

2010-02-03T19:05:00.003-06:00

Surly Wet

Brewery: Surly, Brooklyn Center, Minnesota

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 7%

Rating: 5 stars

Wet hop/fresh hop beers were all over the place this year, especially this fall, and though I may be a bit biased, Surly's was the best. For reference, here are the others I had and how I rated them:

Minneapolis Town Hall Fresh Hop 2009: 3.5 stars. Needed more balance, though I realize that's a difficult task for a fresh hopped beer. Tasted sweaty.

Two Brothers Heavy Handed: 4 stars for both Cascade and Willamette versions. Cascade had delicious burps. Willamette was a bit creamier.

Founders Dry Hopped Pale Ale: 4 stars. Lighter hops, metallic backbone.

Avery Dry Hopped IPA: 3.5 stars. Incredibly bitter. Smelled like clover.

Boulder Hazed and Infused: 3.5 stars. A good beer. As you can see, most of these are solid. But not that memorable.

Left Hand Warrior IPA: 4.5 stars. Easily my favorite beer from this brewery. Round flavor, lasting bitterness.

Great Divide Fresh Hop: 4.5 stars. "Better than Surly Wet? Close, but not quite. Delicious Delicious."

Deschutes Hop Trip: 3.5 stars. Sweetest of the bunch.

Like I said, fresh hopped beers were everywhere. So what separates Surly's effort from the rest? I don't know. Maybe it was because I was on hand for the beer's release. Everything tastes better when it's being unveiled for the first time. And accompanied by spring rolls. Maybe it's because I love that Surly touch; the grapefruit, the huge roof-of-your-mouth pull you get after every sip.

Perhaps, though, it was because this wet hopper, as opposed to most on the list above, improved as I emptied it. These beers have a tendency to wear me out after a full 12 or 16 ounces. This one had just the right amount of balance to accompany the big hop pulse. Don't get me wrong, I love my hops as much as the next guy. But this one didn't have the 'eating a hop plant' bluntness that many do. At the time of my first tasting, I called it a triumph. And I stand by that statement.

The Best of 2009: #3

2010-02-02T17:35:00.005-06:00

New Glarus Wisconsin Belgian Red

Brewery: New Glaurs, New Glarus, Wisconsin

Style: Fruit Beer

ABV: 5.1%

Rating: 5 stars

Prior to having this, I'd had two kinds of cherry beers: the incredibly sour kriek, and the cough-syrup sweet nastiness. I expected this one to fall into the sour category, but I was quite wrong. Not to say, obviously, that that was a bad thing.

This beer is brewed with handfuls of Wisconsin cherries, and the flavor is not that of a cherry-flavored beer, but a mouth-coating cherry spritzer that happened to have fermented. It tasted like cherry pie in a glass. By far the best fruit beer I've had, and one that I'd present to guests. Now, if only we could get New Glarus in Minnesota.

(These reviews are getting shorter the longer I let them drift. Top two coming this week, promise.)

The Best of 2009: #4

2010-01-12T19:03:00.005-06:00

Town Hall Mango Mama

Brewery: Minneapolis Town Hall, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 6%

Rating: 5 stars

It took me far too long to give the mangoed version of Town Hall's Masala Mama a look. There was some initial hesitance: Kristie is allergic to mangoes and mango flavor (yeah, we don't get dessert that much), and therefore we never have them around the house. Also, mangoes aren't near the top of my favorite fruits list (pineapple is). And why mess with an already outstanding IPA? Masala Mama, sadly available only on location, is one of the can't-miss IPAs of the upper midwest.

The positive reviews kept pouring in from friends, though the online responses are strikingly polar. It seems to be a love it or hate it beer, with the haters citing the overpowering mango. More fruit than hops. You can see why this would be a concern of mine due to my distaste for mangoes. In fact, earlier in the year I got my hands on a Virgin Islands Tropical Mango, and compared the taste to paint chips.

Well, the first sip of Mango Mama eased my worries. The detractors' point is not lost: the mango is very strong in both the smell and the initial lip smack. It's big, but not bigger than the Masala hops, which carry the beer out the back of your mouth. An extremely pleasant finish.

How good was this beer? Near the end of our June patio stay, a moth found its way into the last swig of my beer. As it struggled, I weighed my options: give up on the final sip due to contamination fears, or fish the moth out and finish the beer, consequences be damned.

I finished the beer.

The Best of 2009: #5

2010-01-11T16:27:00.006-06:00

Russian River Publication

Brewery: Russian River, Santa Rosa, California (collaborative: see below)

Style: Saison

ABV: 8%

Rating: 5 stars

That's me, enjoying my Russian River Publication at Denver's Falling Rock Tap House, the stop for any beer lover visiting the Rocky Mountain State. A great selection of draughts, and the most beer paraphernalia I've ever seen assembled in one place.

So here's the back story on Publication. Russian River owner and brewer Vinnie Cilurzo, along with members of beer bars Toronado (San Francisco), Horse Brass Pub (Portland), Brouwers (Seattle), Monk's Cafe (Philadelphia) and Falling Rock Tap House (Denver), formed a brewing group called the Publican National Committee. Publication, a strong saison modeled after Orval, is the PNC's inaugural beer.

I'm not sure I have all the details correct, so that's as much as I feel comfortable saying.

Now, it doesn't hurt that Orval is one of my favorite beers, so I went in assuming I would like it. And a draught only, limited release beer from Russian River--a brewery whose beers don't make it close to Minnesota? This I could not pass up.

The look certainly reminded of Orval: light, sparkling and highly carbonated. Some white grape and other delicate fruits, but the brett smell is the star. Live yeast, that is, for non beer jargoners. I promised to leave out the jargon, but you say brett and beer lovers can smell it instantly. Funky and champagne-like.

Easy drinking, especially for the bumped-up ABV. Again, the live yeast hits hard at the finish and is the lasting impression of the brew. A bit tart, sour, and with that lovely sparkle that makes it feel like a classy beverage. I can't say it was better than Orval (though I've had some bad Orval), but I'd love to be able to taste them back to back. Sadly, I don't see that ever happening.

This was the last beer I had on our five-day Colorado trip, and I'm glad I dragged the family to Falling Rock before we boarded the return flight.

The Best of 2009: #6

2010-01-10T16:36:00.006-06:00

Struiselensis

Brewery: De Struise, Oostvleteren, Belgium

Style: Sour Ale

ABV: 6%

Rating: 5 stars

A gem find from a Christmas '08 trip to Sioux Falls. I had a handful of Struise beers to choose from, and randomly selected this sparkling sour ale.

Sour doesn't do this one justice. This is as tart as the tartest candy; enough to make your eyes water. Lots of funky yeast, too. The carbonation is great; I preferred it super cold, like a sparkling cold duck the kids drink on New Years. Floral, lemony and bright.

Yet with all these potent flavors and funks, it finished gently and was shockingly easy to drink. I like challenging my taste buds in all aspects of cuisine; whether it be a vinegar tart beer, a super spicy dish or pungent olive, and I don't mind a challenging sour. This one was not challenging, and I'd venture to guess that your average beer drinker might even enjoy a glass of this. Unfortunately, I haven't seen this bottle in Minnesota, though I haven't scoured the shelves completely. Hopefully I'll find it again soon. I've never driven as far as Sioux Falls just for a beer, but I'm not putting it completely out of the question.

The Best of 2009: #7

2010-01-10T15:52:00.005-06:00

Three Floyds Alpha King

Brewery: Three Floyds, Munster, Indiana

Style: American Pale Ale

ABV: 6%

Rating: 5 stars

I was lucky enough in 2009 to get my hands on a few Three Floyds offerings, and Alpha King barely nudged out the Dreadnaught Imperial IPA as my favorite.

It's simply a perfect pale ale. It starts with a potent hoppy aroma--obvious Centennials and Cascades. The musky, unfiltered texture makes it creamy but smooth. At 6%, it's incredibly drinkable, and as far as drink-in-bulk beers go, this is by far the best I've had. There's enough depth and flavor to enjoy a single bottle, but if I had time and an empty stomach, a six pack wouldn't stretch my stamina.

The hops carry over to the taste, with a nice biscuit malt giving the beer balance and substance. Pale ales have a tendency to go one of two ways: hops overpowering the malt, or malt overpowering the hops. This one does neither and it's that balance that sets it apart from the standard, bland offerings you so often get from craft breweries.

I snagged my six pack on a summer visit to the Chicago area, but now that it's available just across the border, I see many more of these in my near future.

The Best of 2009: #8

2010-01-10T11:29:00.005-06:00

Oskar Blues Deviant Dale's

Brewery: Oskar Blues, Lyons, Colorado

Style: American Pale Ale

ABV: 7.1%

Rating: 4.5 stars

Left: The sampler at the Oskar Blues Brewery in Lyons, CO.

You wouldn't think it possible that an influential, groundbreaking brewery could exist in a town like Lyons, Colorado. A town of around 1500, built along two parallel streets, Lyons is barely a blip on the route from Denver to the Rockies. Nevertheless, Lyons is home to Oskar Blues Brewery, the first U.S. craft brewery to package its full lineup in cans (I'm going to trust the brewery here rather than research).

So it was mid afternoon on an August Friday when I found myself alone in a dark basement bar ordering a sampler: OB's five year-round offerings: TenFIDY, Gordon, Dale's Pale Ale, Mama's Little Yella Pils and Old Chub; limited releases Woo Moon and One Nut Brown Ale; and specialty brew of the moment: Deviant Dale's.

A dry-hopped version of their popular flagship pale ale, Deviant Dale's was only available at the brewery and I felt lucky to get a taste. Side note: there are two OB breweries; one in Lyons, and one in nearby Longmont, home of Left Hand Brewery. All the beers from the Longmont brewery are shipped around the country. The Lyons versions stay in house. The bartender said there was a noticeable difference, and the Longmont offerings were less cared for. One sniff of my Gordon was all she needed to know this version had come from Longmont. Interesting.

But back to Deviant Dale's. This was definitely brewed in Lyons, and as a dry-hopped pale ale, it was by no means revolutionary. If anything, it was cliched. Everyone is dry hopping. But you know why everyone is dry hopping? Because it's great. Tasty. Aromatic. However, while many dry-hopped pales offer a much richer smell, many don't carry the difference through to the taste. I had experienced this just two days prior, when Avery's dry-hopped IPA didn't deliver the taste that the smell promised. Deviant Dale's did.

Lighter in color, and with a much bigger head than the original, Deviant Dale's looks like the beer that I love tasting: A little froth on the lips, a smooth glide down the throat, and the hope of a nice bitter linger. Hops teetering between grapefruit and pine, DD had what I like to call the bug spray finish. Stings a bit, gets into your nostrils.

After the sampler, I chose this as my featured pint. And I could have had pint after pint. But, being in Lyons, the shopping was limited, and the women of the trip joined me long before my drinking was done. Such is life.

The Best of 2009: #9

2010-01-03T17:38:00.006-06:00

Founders Curmudgeon Old Ale

Brewery: Founders, Grand Rapids, Michigan

Style: Old Ale

ABV: 9.8%

Rating: 4.5 stars

This is a repeat review from late March '09, so instead of trying to recreate that review cold, I'm simply going to repost the original. Lazy I know, but I like how the words spilled out in the original.

The appearance is akin to the most pleasing barleywines; ruby turning to magenta to caramel. Not much head, and none of it lasts. When I swirl the glass, it rocks and relaxes quickly, and doesn't seem like it will coat my mouth so my dinner winds up with a curmudgeonly aftertaste.

It's a bully of a sniffer. I dove in a half dozen times and each time found another layer. It's geekily layered; a Sufjan Stevens tune and a David Lynch flick. (Side note: you see what happens when I realize I'm no good at picking out specifics in a beer. I resort to wild metaphors and pointless side notes.) I'll try. There's brandy. Port wine. Obvious alcohol presence indeed. Sweet, intensely sweet, and more than just the clumped-together dark fruits and caramel. It smells stiff and warm, but has the life that a big stout might not.

I hoped the taste would recall memories of Bell's Third Coast Old Ale, and it does. It's just a beauty of a beer. Barleywine-ish? Yes, but this Old Ale business makes it sound so much more majestic and regal. The caramel (word of the review) stick is there, and it gets better as the beer gets warmer. Beer drinking for dummies advice of the day: let the beer warm. Drinking a beer at different temperatures is revealing and rewarding. There's the alcoholic surge that must exist in a nearly 10% beer, but it's delicately disguised. I feel it, know it's there, but can't find it. It passes the chug test, too. Drinking this one sip to sip is great, but a giant swallow doesn't overwhelm.

So easy to drink, this one. I planned on it lasting me through dinner, and it would serve as a wonderful dessert drink, but I don't think it will make it to either. Luckily, I've got a Fuller's Vintage I think I might pop tonight as well. Not sure what it is about this old ales; it's the combination of potency, drinkability and mystique that has me ball and chain. This one is dragging me.

January 2010 edit: Didn't have the '08 Fuller's Vintage Ale that night, but had it New Year's Day this year. Equally outstanding. Perhaps a review soon.

The Best of 2009: #10

2010-01-02T22:23:00.005-06:00

Stone IPA

Brewery: Stone, Escondido, California

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 6.9%

Rating: 4.5 Stars

Unquestionably one of the most widely-sampled IPAs, Stone's had 2134 ratings on ratebeer at the time of posting. I'm certainly blazing no trails with this review. However, we still can't get Stone beers in Minnesota (I think??) and I had to cross into cheese country to get some. I'm almost positive I've had it before courtesy of Cali Uncle Mike, but not since this little project started. Want to know a cliched, embarrassing secret?

I watched Julie and Julia last night and became the seven millionth person to re-dedicate himself to his blog. I'm ashamed to admit it. But, looking back at 2009, I had a lot of great beer, 340 first timers to be exact, and sharing them with a pregnant wife isn't near as interesting as sharing them with my now 12 followers.

So, to the Stone. The standard IPA rates a tad lower than the Ruination IPA, which is stronger and packs a little more punch, but I prefer the regular ole IPA. This distinction is a good representation of what happened to my beer tastes in 2009. When I tried some of my first outstanding double/Imperial IPAs in early 2008 I was blown away. Obsessed. But, a year later, I felt the field was getting a bit watered down. Everyone was throwing copious amounts of hops into everything, and I thought the quality took a back seat to the quantity. I was vacuumed back to the straightforward, standard IPAs. Still with the big aroma. Still with the sticky, mouth-gripping bitterness. But not as super-sized.

I recall the point in my life where I didn't super size simply because it was 'the best value.' Sometimes, even though the 44 oz fountain Super America Coke is the same price as the 22 oz, you really only need 22 ounces. Sometimes I don't need the copious amounts of hops. And in the beer world, the double IPA does cost more than the regular.

Having trouble staying on task for this review.

The tasting dates back to March 5, 2009. From a bottle, obviously. On that day, I said: "The smell reminds me of the best: Furious, Two Hearted. Just want to keep smelling it." I can name 20 beers I've said that about that have thoroughly disappointed. This one clearly didn't.

As opposed to the often buttery, syrupy double IPAs, this beer was crisp and sparkling, with good carbonation and cleanliness. The citrus aroma carried through brilliantly, which is often the biggest source of IPA letdown. And the bitterness, I often describe it as a back-end grab, takes over when the flavor begins to subside. Back-end grab: the beer, after swallowing, reaches back to the roof of your mouth, grabbing the moisture and pulling it down your throat as its last gasp of life. It leaves your mouth dry and...bitter. It's the IPA's signature, and I love how it is a continuation of the tasting. The beer isn't over when you swallow.

The biggest reason that Stone's IPA falls here over the dozens of good IPAs I had this year, and the reason I prefer it to the Ruination IPA, is its drinkability. It doesn't overwhelm you, isn't difficult to choke down and is enjoyable from the first sip to the last drip. On that March tasting I said I "could drink one after another all night," and I thoroughly believe I could.

The Worst Beers of 2009

2009-12-21T20:00:00.007-06:00

My favorite time of year: end-of-year-list time. It's not entirely easy to get motivated to write about my least favorite beers, you know with me not liking them and all, but it has to be done. Instead of ranking them this year as I did in 2008, I'm simply going to divide my least favorite suds into a few catchy categories. My apologies if I shatter your favorite beer's feelings. And no, Stella Artois and New Belgium Fat Tire, as much as I despise the idea of those beers (as well as the taste) aren't on this list.

To qualify, I must have tried a beer for the first time in 2009 (some beers I had had previously, but before journaling).

The Macro No-Brainers (I hesitate to even list them):

Miller High Life Light
Michelob Ultra
Strohs
Keystone Light
Coors

I mean really. What a waste of a)my drinking time and allotted calories, b)my typing time, and c)your reading time.

Some notes: Strohs got a full star because I was in a great mood at the time, night fishing in Lake Blanche. It's likely the last Strohs (was it the first?) I'll ever have. Thanks Uncle Dave for leaving that one in the cabin fridge.

Coors, while not being a great beer, sports one of the best cans in the business. And it was enjoyed on the golf course, so who am I to complain.

The non-macro scuzz:

Blue Diamond Lager. Early in the year, I confirmed what I had thought upon my first attempt at this gem. It is in all likelihood the worst beer of all time. For further elaboration, read that post.

Grain Belt Premium Light. Especially painful because I actually enjoy a nice cold Grain Belt Premium every now and then. It leaves all other cased-can beers far behind. The Light edition is painful.

Iron City Light. Apparently legendary in Pennsylvania, or so I'm told by Arizona relatives. Couldn't resist when a six pack hit the counter at a pre-wedding gathering in Phoenix. Not the worst light beer I've encountered; in fact, I probably would have slammed a few if I had to. Luckily, I didn't.

Around the World in Crappy suds:

Henninger Premium Lager. Bought this solely for the can. Knew it would be bad, but this was beyond disgusting. Probably would be 2nd on the worst of list behind BDL.

Presidente. Available everywhere in the Caribbean, I slugged mine before boarding the ship in the Dominican Republic. The best thing about this beer? The $3 accompanying dog toy ball.

Tsingtao Pure Draft. A common thread: purchased strictly so I could possess a bottle full of Chinese characters. Bought this one at an Asian marketplace outside Chicago.

The Craft Brewing Mistakes:

Leinenkugels 1888 Bock. Maybe I'm ignorant, but a dunkler bock sounds skunky right off the bat. I had zero relevant notes from my original tasting: "Utterly horrible. Took my best effort to finish it." Thankfully, it'll be the last one I finish.

Sam Adams Blackberry Witbier. The gold standard for syrupy, overly sweet fruit bombs. "Yuck yuck yuck. Cough syrup. Awful."

Left Hand Polestar Pilsner. Just a messy pilsner from a brewery I had no luck with this year. "Like gnawing on a sock. Bad even as a chaser. Dreadful." And these comments even with the built in vacation ratings boost.

Spanish Peaks Honey Raspberry Ale. Given to me for free by Ed from Heritage Liquor after I told him I was providing beer for a work gathering that would include women. "Sometimes they go for stuff like this," he said. They didn't, and it was I who suffered. "Tasteless and flat, like a sparkling water that's been left in the fridge."

Firehouse Hefeweizen. A stab in the dark sixer purchase gone horribly wrong. "Tastes like a Mich lite. Not a hefeweizen. If I wasn't so poor, this six pack would go down the drain."

If you found any of these delights in your stocking this holiday season, I'm sorry. Maybe you can enjoy them more than I did. If you've avoided them to date, continue to do so until impending Mayan apocalypse.

21st Amendment

2009-12-09T21:14:00.008-06:00

What better night than a freezing Wednesday to try two of the newer beers to the Minnesota scene, 21st Amendment's Brew Free! or Die IPA and Monk's Blood. I have to force myself to type as I drink them, because my journal notes aren't thorough enough for a full post, and though I've had plenty of beers recently, I can't put together a coherent paragraph weeks after the sampling. So, for these reviews, I'll write what I think as I taste, and we'll see how that looks. I'll start with the IPA.

21st Amendment Brew Free! or Die IPA

Brewery: 21st Amendment, San Francisco, California (Contract brewed at Cold Spring Brewery in Cold Spring, Minnesota)

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 7.2%

Rating: 3.5 stars

The look: Classic cloudy melon IPA color. Almost like a glass of orange jello that's been dirtied up. Not much light gets through. Fair amount of head that dissipates soon after pouring. Good lace left on the glass, and yes, you should pour it into a glass.

The smell: Again, classic IPA smell. Big aromatic hops; citrusy and grapefruit. There's something here though that I can't quite pinpoint, and it's a detractor. Almost like rotten fruit. Let's hope it doesn't carry over to the taste.

The taste: Maybe if I could get that smell out of my brain, it wouldn't transfer to the taste. But it does. I even poured it into a different pint glass to make sure it wasn't the glass. It instantly latches onto my tongue, but luckily, doesn't hang around for much longer. Just tried a swig while plugging my nose. A little better. I will admit: this is the last beer from the six pack and the first where I've really noticed this off-putting aroma. I think I'll brush it off as an anomaly. Let's focus on the other flavors.

It's balanced. Bitter, but not the bitterest. Sweet, but not the sweetest. Floral, but not the floral...est. It definitely has a sturdy backbone that a 7.2% beer must, but it's the bitter bite that is the lasting flavor.

The mouthfeel: Fairly delicate for a beer of this content. Runs smoothly through the throat. There isn't much carbonation, so it's a little more flat and less sparkling than many beer drinkers might be used to. Overall, it's a pleasant visitor to the mouth.

The drinkability: If it weren't for the rotten fruit factor, I'd say high. It drinks fast and leaves a good lasting impression. However, we can't ignore the most prominent characteristic, and I think a rotten taste would discourage me quite considerably.

I liked the first four I had more than I liked the one I so closely scrutinized. Therefore, I can't pan it. I also know that it's a well-respected beer and of the reviews I read after writing mine, none mentioned a similar peculiarity. The one feeling many reviewers had was a hesitancy to expect a decent beer from a can. This is absurd. One of our favorite midwest breweries (easily the best in Minnesota), Surly, packages its beers in cans, and many breweries have gone to cans in recent years: Oskar Blues and SKA come to mind. Don't be afraid to love a beer from a can.

21st Amendment Monk's Blood

Brewery: 21st Amendment, San Francisco, California (contract brewed again)

Style: Belgian Dark Ale

ABV: 8.3%

Rating: 4.5 stars

First things first: a KILLER can. Although it's incredibly difficult to read the inscription (it circles the can in a small medieval font), it looks cool, and the monk's haircuts are spectacular. Let's crack this baby open.

Here's the description given: a Belgian-style dark ale brewed with cinnamon, vanilla oak chips and dried figs. We'll get to the smell and taste in a bit, but first the appearance. The color is outstanding; it pours a deep purple and a full tulip glass maintains the purple, but looks pretty black next to the can. It's not a thick stout black, though. It looks more like a soda, with visible carbonation and a silky swirlability. Little head and virtually no lacing.

The figs are the first and strongest smell. At first sniff, I wondered if I could distinguish it from a fruit beer, but upon further sniffings, the vanilla and the oak worked their way through. The figs are prominent, but they are subdued by the other elements.

From the first taste, I'm pretty sure I'll like this more than the IPA. It's so silky, and the figs are delicious. The vanilla and cinnamon give it a sweet creamy texture and the Belgian yeast is evident, but not overpowering. It's warm, pleasant and so drinkable. This does not drink like a beer of its substance. Even more than the slippery IPA, Monk's Blood slides down the throat effortlessly.

This is the first release in the brewery's Insurrection Series (aren't all breweries doing limited edition series right now?). It most certainly won't be around for long. Do yourself a favor, go to your nearest bestest liquor store, drop ten bucks, and be a happy drinker.

So what have I been drinking?

2009-11-10T17:27:00.003-06:00

How about some November nuggets. Every time I post, I make a vow to become more consistent, and this time I really mean it. I've had lots of good stuff recently, from tasty porters and stouts to hop heavy fresh-hopped IPAs. November's been good to me, and here are some of the reasons why:

Michigan Stouts. In a three-day span I tackled New Holland The Poet, Dark Horse Tres Blueberry Stout and Bells Kalamazoo Stout. First time for each. Surprisingly, the blueberry stout took the honors for me. Surprising, perhaps, because anytime a fruit is mentioned in a beer's name, flags fly up the pole. I've had a lot of good fruit-infused beers in my time, but I can't help but conjure the horrifying thoughts that accompany Samuel Adams Cherry Wheat anytime I see a fruit on a beer label.

Subtlety is the key with Tres. And the fact that blueberry pairs very well with those rich stout flavors. The blueberry is quite present in the beer's smell, peeking out behind the malted wall of oats. The flavor is truer to a traditional oatmeal stout, with the blueberry shining on the back end of each swallow. Not overpowering, and a wonderful choice for a one-beer night.

The Poet gave me that classic silky oatmeal stout texture that goes down well on a chilly fall evening. You'd be doing these beers if you tried them in summer; the circumstances under which a beer is sampled factor largely into its reception. In this case, I picked the perfect night for the Poet. Well balanced sweetness to accompany the oats, with just enough bubble to keep the mouth lively.

The Kalamazoo Stout entered the unintentional derby as the favorite, and while it certainly didn't disappoint, it didn't pay out as its odds suggested. If this were a boxing title match, the pundits would be telling you none of these beers deserved to lose. What I liked about Kalamazoo: it's only 6% ABV, which is low by today's stout standards, so the complexity of flavors takes over. With the booze factor out of the way, you get a heavy dose of licorice and a nice vanilla sweetness. It has a very long, roasted linger that lets you keep tasting each sip long after it's gone. I also liked the earthy quality it possessed. Very different than the imperial stouts I've been trying, and part of me thinks I wasn't ready for that distinction. I'd like to have another.

What else excited me? Local upstart breweries, as in Fulton. Gives all of us homebrewers hope, doesn't it, that a couple garage brewers can make their way onto the tap list at the Muddy Pig. their debut, Sweet Child of Vine IPA, was a pleasant surprise. And a telling title: this IPA was especially viney--lots of garden fresh hops present. I swear I tasted basil, and strong. There are only five reviews thus far on this guy, and I seem to be the only one detecting that. I'm either getting better at flavor identification, or I'm still way off. Or I don't care. I like the cloudiness, and the hops struck me as a citrus/pine hybrid. Burps like a pale ale. In case you were wondering. All in all, a very nice debut. Next post: The Brewmasters Series/Single Batch/Unleashed/Unchained/Limited Release fad. Hits and misses.

Milestone Beers

2009-10-15T20:36:00.003-05:00

After nearly a two month absence, the blog is back.

As is the great beer. September was a bit of a break for me, when I tallied only 13 new beers. That ranks as the fewest for any month since I started tracking in mid-February 2008. The reason for this? I was nearing my biggest milestone beer to date; beer 500.

I had the perfect beer in mind, though I'd have to wait until October 7 to try Surly Wet, their highly-anticipated fresh-hopped IPA. Typically, hops are harvested and dried before being added to your favorite beer. With a fresh or wet hop beer, the hops are harvested and immediately added to the brew, without being dried. A hop head's dream. Surly shipped in 1400 pounds of Washington hops for Wet.

The release party, held at Uptown's newest Thai restaurant, Roat Osha, was crowded, and it probably didn't help that it coincided with a Twins playoff game. The beer didn't disappoint, even if the elbow-to-elbow bar felt more like a Saturday night in Dinkytown than a Wednesday at a Thai joint.

The beer: classic grapefruit and floral aromas, instantly identifiable as a West Coast IPA. It had been a long time since I'd had a hoppy delight, I realized. The taste featured more pine than citrus, and the bitter finish was awesome. I like to describe that sensation as something that sucks the moisture from the roof of your mouth and buries it down your throat. I love that feeling. A nice, long linger.

I've had a number of fresh hopped beers (and I had a handful more this week) and I've found that they are rewarding for hop purists, but even I sometimes struggle near the end of a pint. I need balance. But Surly Wet got better with each sip, and stood up after several tastings. A week later, I tried it along side four other fresh hop beers: Left Hand's Warrior IPA, Cascade and Willamette versions of Two Brothers Heavy Handed IPA and Town Hall's Fresh Hop 2009. Surly was still the best. Not that I'm biased.

I'd finally matched the accomplishment of drinking 500 different beers (in 21 months) with a deserving beer. I knew I'd struggled with this in the past, often forgetting when milestones were approaching or losing track of the beers I'd had. This time I nailed it.

Or so I thought.

Tonight, I re-calculated my archives to determine beers 100, 200, 300 and 400. Somehow, along the way, I lost track of a couple beers. Surly Wet was beer #502.

The milestone beers to date:

100: Michelob Ultra Tuscan Orange Grapefruit. What a mistake, but one that was entirely intentional. One must tour the basement before graduating to the penthouse. .5 stars

200: Hacker-Pschorr Oktoberfest Marzen. I don't particularly enjoy traditional Oktoberfests. 2.5 stars

300: Medalla Light. Puerto Rico's macro! Whatever. I was drinking a beer on a patio in Puerto Rico. 1.5 stars

400: Tyranena Bitter Woman in the Rye. Ooh! A chance here. But no, a major disappointment in my opinion. 3 stars

500: Sam Adams Oktoberfest. Blah. 2.5 stars

There will be more milestones to come, for sure, with the next biggest being my 1000th. I've got Surly penciled in for that one.

Colorado: Day 4

2009-08-26T18:04:00.017-05:00

I will finish this project, though a few happy hours may pass in the meantime. On to day 4, which was brewery-free and when I became 'that guy,' stumbling around the deck and spraying beanbags as accurate as my steps.

I still had a healthy stable of beers I needed to slug, so this night fell on the binge-drinking sword. As you might conclude, the reviews became quite brief toward the end of the night. No matter; I didn't expect any of these to blow my mind. They simply made the cut by being obscure or from a state I hadn't sampled or something I was sure I couldn't get at home.

Cucapa Chupacabras Pale Ale

Brewery: Cerveceria Cucapa, Mexicali, Mexico

Style: American Pale Ale

ABV: 5.8%

Rating: 3 stars

The best Mexican beer I've had. Certainly more flavor than any I'd previously tried. Good sweet smell, with a nice balance of hops and malt. Hints of Summit's flagship EPA, but is a bit sweeter and lacked the back-end bite that I enjoy. Sips were filling and thick, but the beer itself went down quite easily. Doesn't hurt that I love the chupacabra.

Green Flash Hop Head Red

Brewery: Green Flash, Vista, California

Style: Amber Ale

ABV: 6.3%

Rating: 4.5 stars

This is not your average amber ale. Hops are incredibly aromatic and it has the hazy ruby appearance of a sturdy IPA. Really nice amarillo hops, which I believe are grossly underused in the juiced hops era. Does have a sweet malt backbone akin to an amber ale, but the big hops on the lips are the story. I'm starting to like these hopped-up reds; recently had Pizza Port's Shark Attack Triple Red and loved that as well. Liked this equally, if not more, than the brewery's West Coast IPA.

Kona Wailua

Brewery: Kona, Kailua Kona, Hawaii

Style: American Pale Wheat Ale

ABV: 5.4%

Rating: 2.5 stars

Assumed this one wouldn't be great when I bought it, but I'd never had a beer brewed with passion fruit before. Nor had I ever had one with a waterfall-bathing beauty on the label. Oh, and it was my first Hawaii beer. Real fruity sweetness. Wouldn't be able to tell you it was passion fruit but I'll take their word for it. So fruity, in fact, ratebeer classifies it as a fruit beer. Of the American Pale Wheat Ales I've had, certainly not my favorite.

Left Hand Sawtooth Ale

Brewery: Left Hand, Longmont, Colorado

Style: Extra Special Bitter

ABV: 4.75%

Rating: 2 stars

Maybe I had it out for Left Hand Brewing (much like I did for Boulder Beer), but I did not like this at all. Smelled musty and dirty. And this coming from a guy who typically enjoys ESBs. Very bland flavors. Not much to report. Like I said, the reviews shrunk as the night lengthened.

Bridgeport ESB

Brewery: Bridgeport, Portland, Oregon

Style: Extra Special Bitter

ABV: 6.1%

Rating: 3 stars

Much more pleasant than the Sawtooth. Had a brighter, more lively smell than most ESBs. I noted it was "real smooth at this hour." Sure, maybe I shouldn't have been reviewing this many beers in one night. I'll give you that.

Cooper's Pale Ale

Brewery: Coopers, Regency Park, Australia

Style: English Pale Ale

ABV: 4.5%

Rating: 2 stars

Again, purchased knowing it wouldn't be enjoyed. Tasted like grass. A fair amount of hop flavor, but hops that tasted like grass. Worst beer of the night.

After four days:
34 new beers (16 samples, 12 bottles, 3 pints, 2 cans, 1 half pint)
Best beer: Green Flash Hop Head Red
Worst beer: Left Hand Polestar Pilsner

Colorado: Day 3, Part 2

2009-08-17T18:36:00.006-05:00

Lost a little steam last night and couldn't finish day 3, which, incidentally, is sort of how day 3 itself felt.

After the Avery excursion, I still had enough juice to cram in a stop at Boulder Beer, but was apprehensive, knowing that the product probably wouldn't match. Maybe I set myself up from the start, but despite its grander exterior, larger tap room and more global following, Boulder Beer is no Avery.

Nine samples for $11. Not bad. Of the nine, I'd had only two (the Singletrack Copper Ale and the Buffalo Gold Ale, both average), so this was a quick way for me to add seven new beers to my index. And of those seven, only two again were above average. A very disappointing collection. So disappointing that it was all I could do to muster some bullet-pointed, four-word reviews of each. In the order that I drank them and with the words used and ratings given at the time:

Pass Time Pale Ale: "Graham cracker? Sweet, but not good. Whatever. 2.5"

Sundance Amber: "Nothing to say. 2.5"

Sweaty Betty: "Frozen pea aftertaste. Banana is there. 2"

Hazed and Infused: "38 IBUs for dry hopped? So subtle. 3.5"

Planet Porter: "Yes coffee. Nothing else. No depth. 2.5"

Mojo IPA: "Tangy orange tangerine. 4"

Cask Planet Porter: "Bigger head. Flatter. Warmer. Less flavor. 2"

So there you have it. Boulder Beer may as well rename itself Boulder Below Average Beer. I'd like to get a bottle of each of these and systematically refute the brewery-given descriptions of each. Ugh.

Maybe I'm giving Boulder Beer a hard time. They were one of the first microbreweries and obviously have had tons of success. The Mojo was delish. They've probably had other specialty beers throughout the years that are worthwhile. I just haven't had any of them. Have and of you?

One final stop for the night at the Mountain Sun Pub and Brewery for dinner and what turned out to be just one half pint of suds. I was stuffed with beer, a bit worn out from the heat and ready for a nap. There were plenty of options to choose from, and I took a stab and went with the nitro tap Illusion Dweller IPA. The results were not what I had in mind. This was not an American IPA, and there was not literature telling me so. Had the sweetness of a British IPA and was flat as could be. There was a certain amount of dry bitterness, but it couldn't offset the sweet flatness. A disappointment and not how I wanted to remember a well-reviewed brewpub.

With that said, the staff was incredible and accommodating, we were greeted with a free appetizer, and though the service and speed were fine, the manager knocked a third of our bill off because of some minor, everyday mishaps. I would go there again if I found myself back in Boulder. And do a little research beforehand.

After three days:
28 new beers (16 samples, 6 bottles, 3 pints, 2 cans, 1 half pint)
Best beer: Avery Hog Heaven Barleywine
Worst beer: Left Hand Polestar Pilsner

Colorado: Day 3, Part 1

2009-08-16T19:25:00.008-05:00

Brewery day, with both Avery and Boulder getting a visit. For those who want to glamorize breweries, Avery is a reality check. Located well off the beaten path in an industrial park on the outskirts of Boulder, the brewery would be difficult to distinguish from any other mid-size factory. The tap room was basically a garage.

Luckily, the beers aren't as generic. At $1 a sample, it's also realistic to imagine trying each of the dozen or so beers they happen to have on tap that afternoon. I tried six, plus a pint.

My mini reviews:

White Rascal: A Belgian White or witbier. Hazy lemonade, a very light color for a craft beer. One word to describe: EASY. This baby flows smoothly. Not over-spiced or packed with intense flavor, which was refreshing for this style. One of my favorite wheats I've had this summer.

14'er ESB: Hooked on the first sip. Dirty malt smell, with that English bitter hook. Tremendous lingering metallic hop flavor. A pungent punch after the light Rascal.

Hog Heaven Barleywine: 104 IBUs? Quite hoppy for a barleywine, and it's evident from the start, because it is also dry-hopped. Earthy vegetable tasted, and much more bitter, as you may have guessed, than a traditional sweet barleywine. The hops snuff out the sweetness and you get a quite potent, almost imperial IPA aftertaste. Without the syrup. Here's an interesting side note: I didn't recall that I'd had this beer before, and was giving it the keen attention as if I hadn't. I ended up giving it 4.5 stars at the brewery, making it the highest-rated beer of the first three days. I loved it. When I got home, though, I checked my records (I also wasn't sure if I'd had the IPA) and found that I gave the Hog Heaven a lukewarm review when I first had it in March.

So do I scribe another review in the journal? Treat it as new? Disregard my clearly off first opinion? I'd rather not go down that road. Once a beer is reviewed, it's official. However, it's obviously fine to change your opinions of a beer without changing the initial review. It's quite common to see revised reviews on both beer rating websites. I'd simply rather not have two entries for one beer on opposite pages in the same journal. A potential solution: an entirely separate journal with new reviews of previously sampled beer. It would be interesting, I think, to see how my taste buds and preferences change over time. I could do this by comparing beers of similar styles from year to year, as well, but I think i may give this idea a try. A sort of second chance journal. Back to the beers.

Fourteen: Avery's 14th anniversary American Strong Ale. Replacing the recently-cashed sixteen on tap. Chocolate malt sweetness, and am I picking up a tiny mint smell? Tastes of figs and cocoa. A pint of this would knock me out. Quite good.

IPA: Fairly subtle and straightforward. I took note of the particularly strong lacing this one left on the glass. Centennial hops come through, but not as favorably as say, Founders IPA. Not the best IPA I've had, but still a nice beer.

Dry-hopped IPA: A special tap room only offering. Much cloudier than the regular IPA, and much more pungent. Smells exactly like clover. Like a weedy garden. One of the most unique smells I've found. The weeds provide for a pretty strong aftertaste as well. Really bitter finish. Not really much better than the regular, which surprised me a bit.

The Kaiser Imperial Oktoberfest: Tapped for the first time this year while we were there, which is fun. Not a lot of liveliness here--very low carbonation. Sweet, malty smell, with a really creamy mouthfeel. Strong aftertaste of Euro hops. Has a very strange sweetness as well, almost grape. Unusual beer. I think a pint of it may be too much for me.

No duds at Avery, that's for sure, and several interesting options worthy of conversation. I passed on the Maharajah, a beer that I've had several times and love, and wasn't really interested in the brown or the porter. All in all, I was happy with the samples I tried, and would have stayed for more had I not felt it necessary to leave room for the imminent stop at Boulder Beer.

Colorado: Day 2

2009-08-13T20:16:00.004-05:00

The longer I let this trip get away from me, the more fuzzy the beers become and the less likely I am to care about documenting them, so I'll do my best to sketch out another day. Luckily, I have my notes, but I've found that I'm pretty bad about consciously taking them when I should be. It took me until day 5 before I really started gathering observations about ambiance and setting; people and conversations. I get so caught up in the beers I'm tasting I almost forget I'm on vacation and should be soaking in every aspect of the moment.

With that said, I wouldn't give Estes Park Brewery high marks for ambiance in the first place. Most breweries, no matter how great their beers are, are not picturesque or elegant. They are warehouses, in strip malls, or in this case, a giant white barn complete with red football jersey lettering across the top. Classy.

Actually, the building pretty much sums up what we'd taste inside: blandness. I don't fault the brewers for assembling a lineup of cookie-cutter craft beers. In fact, that's probably their intention. Estes Park is a resort town, one that attracts thousands of people from all corners, and I imagine the brewmasters at EP Brewery would rather create boring beers with mass appeal than attempt amped-up craft mastery.

They did have a free tasting bar. With stale pretzels.

I decided to sample all ends of the spectrum (passing on the raspberry wheat), and started with the Stinger Honey Wheat. The wheat was simply overpowered by the honey, and while I enjoyed the departure from the classic wheat ale trap, I wasn't exactly looking for a sticky swallow of honey. This is all the analysis I can give nine days removed from a 4 ounce sample.

In fact, let's dispense with the analysis altogether. From there, I tried the Trail Ridge Red, Staggering Elk Lager and Samson Stout. Each one was more average than the previous. I could see these as being gateway beers for people interested in trying different styles, but why go to Estes Park to do it? Go to New Ulm.

The second night was similar to the first: slug as many new beers as possible while maintaining beer-rating integrity. This evening I started with the second can of the week, Upslope Pale Ale. I knew this brewery was young, but wow--they first started brewing just last October. This beer bragged of its "Patagonian hops," which I hadn't come across before in my tastings. Someone help me out--Patagonian hops? Either way, the flavor was light, like a subtle Centennial. A pretty easy drinker, one you could convince your macro friends to try, if not only because it comes in cans. Not going to overpower any experienced craft drinker, and not as pungent as a European Pale Ale, but drinkable. It is a nice looking can, too.

Next was the Uinta XVI Anniversary Barleywine, my first ever beer from Utah. What a surprise! A 10.4% beer from Utah?!?! How'd they get the permit? Who cares, because this was a delicious beer. Dark fruits and roasted coffee everywhere; reminded me of a mincemeat pie on a cold December night in London. Though it has been a while. Regardless, this one is in the mix for the best of the first two days with the SKA Modus Hoperandi.

From there, I had solid style representations in Deschutes Black Butte Porter and Odell 90 Shilling Ale (a Scottish Ale). I've run out of steam, though, and can't find the keys to describe them in any more length than that.

After two days: 13 new beers (6 bottles, 2 cans, 2 pints, 3 samples).
Best beer: tie--SKA Modus Hoperandi and Uinta XVI Anniversary Barleywine (both 4 stars)
Worst beer: Left Hand Polestar Pilsner

Colorado: Day 1

2009-08-10T18:31:00.006-05:00

I'd love to tell you I didn't spend 20 minutes trying to think up a more creative title than that, but I don't want to lie. When did title-writing become so difficult? Maybe the better question is when did I start caring? Nobody needs fake chuckles at lame play-on-words headlines. Besides, it's not like any of my readers have a post with a similar title...

The goals of this trip (beyond the obvious family bonding, outdoor adventures, yada yada yada):

1. Visit any number of the numerous--and there are tons--breweries, brewpubs, saloons, gastro pubs, beer bars and watering holes in the central Colorado area.
2. Purchase, consume, ponder and review a wide selection of beers unavailable in Minnesota.
3. Leave with taste buds intact and functioning.
4. Don't alienate and/or piss off family.
5. Don't be 'that guy.'

That's sort of a prerequisite goal of any trip, outing, situation. Has being 'that guy' ever been a good thing? Unfortunately, I believe I became 'that guy,' drunkenly chucking bean bags across the cabin deck by myself well into the morning hours.

Day One.

Missed the 7:15 am flight to Denver. Several reasons. Incredible congestion at airport. One security person funneling all passengers to one bag-checking metal-detecting line. Random bag-check selection. Most remote departure gate. Whatever the reason, the four of us somehow made it onto the next flight when twelve connecting passengers missed their connection. Arrive in Denver around 11 am. Bags, shuttle, rental car, and we're on our way to Boulder, and stop number one: Liquor Mart.

This is what I love about liquor stores, and exactly what I was getting at at the top of this post. Rarely does a liquor store have a creative name, and more often than not, the facade simply says "LIQUOR." They know it, we know it, everyone knows it--you need not say anything more. How many "Liquor Marts" or "Liquor Depots" or "Wine and Spirits" are there in the country? Sure, you could throw your name in front of 'Liquor,' but people are stopping all the same. Why bother?

Liquor Mart was the stop because I read they had the best selection of singles in the area. I was surprised in general at the lack of favorable liquor store reviews in Colorado, specifically Denver. Luckily, Boulder was directly on the way to our destination, and I had a car full of booze-hungry fiends ready to splurge. I picked up a dozen or so single bottles and cans--yes! cans! (20% off mixed six packs!), mostly from mountain/west coast breweries I'd heard of but never tried. I just made my monthly exclamation point quota. Had to grab a Chupacabras Pale Ale from Mexico because I simply love the chupacabra. A label-saver if I've ever seen one.

Before leaving Boulder, we stopped for lunch at the Lazy Dog Sports Grill and Bar. Maybe wouldn't have been our top choice but we were famished and already feeling the one hour time difference. I tried the Lazy Dog Amber, which I later learned was an in-house brew contracted by Firestone Walker Brewing Company in Paso Robles, California. Oh well. It was decent, but really fell off toward the last third of the pint. Ambers are difficult for me. This one was pretty nutty, biscuity (don't like using that word. feels awkward) and had an aftertaste akin to a handful of dirt. My last two comments: "Gets worser and worser. Skunky." Decent may have been overstating it I guess.

Stomachs and trunk filled, we meandered toward the Estes Park area and location of Luther Lodge. Where, it turns out, bloody marys were being served, with Left Hand's Polestar Pilsner as chaser. I believe that was the role this beer was meant to play. I'm not one for pilsners to begin with, but this one was "like gnawing on a sock." Not even worthy of my traditional complaint about lackluster pilsners tasting like grass. No matter, the bloody was putting me in the right place.

Next up was Great Divide's Denver Pale Ale, a malty English pale ale with a bit of a metallic hop finish. I like these beers, but this one wasn't my favorite. Next. A can! I like cans, and I enjoyed canned beers from three different Colorado breweries on the trip. This one, SKA Modus Hoperandi, was my favorite beer of the night. Nice grapefruit hop smell as soon as you crack it. One of the reasons I love cans. You can't crack a bottle like you can a can. That sizzle snap followed by bursting scents is pure and untouchable. This was one of those beers I could tell I was going to love just by its color and how it rolled in the glass. Nice creamy texture; not too thin, and definitely not syrupy, but with enough flavor to satisfy. Terrific pine bitter finish as well.

My final beer of day one was the Alaskan Summer Ale, a kolsch. Again with the styles I don't terribly enjoy. On the night's spectrum, this one fell somewhere in between the Lazy Dog and the DPA. Not skunky, for sure, but not a lot to keep me coming back to the glass. Had a ciderish quality to it, like a sweet, flat British tap cider. I'm not sure the words sweet and flat could be used to describe anything in a pleasant way. Maybe a frosting-slathered graham cracker. Day one in the books.

July, July!

2009-08-01T11:45:00.003-05:00

How fast we go. Fifteen new beers into the hopper this month. A below average number, I suppose, but I spent a good amount of time pounding Summits and Surlys on patios and mixing bloody marys and gin and tonics lakeside. And there were some monuments: my first Three Floyds (the stellar Alpha King and slightly puzzling Fantabulous Resplendence XI Anniversary). Still waiting for the right moment to pop the Dreadnaught IPA. I added my first gluten-free beer to the list, Gordon Biersch's Bard's Tale Beer, a sparkling sorghum mess also known as Bard's Tale Dragon's Gold. Just starting to see this one pop up in the Twin Cities.

So, let's drag this out a bit. Mid-summer awards.

Best hibiscus-infused Belgian: Goose Island Fleur. I guess my taste buds don't have much experience with hibiscus, because I basically tasted a Belgian ale. It was good, though I suspect had I stuck with my original order of Founders Cerise I would have left the Happy Gnome a bit happier. Too hard to pass up a draught-only limited edition hibiscus beer, though. And it blew away my companion's beer, Widmer Hefeweizen. I'm done with hefes I think. Most are drinkable, pleasant, but none blast your palate. Congrats, Fleur.

Best month-cap nightcap: Last night's Tsingtao Pure Draft. Also the worst. Possibly, in fact, the worst beer I had this month, however predictable that may have been. Purchased only for the Chinese characters on the label. I have another character-laden brew in the basement that's identity may never be discovered. Tsingtao just felt right at 2 am I guess.

Best surprise: Rouge Brutal Bitter. Picked up on a whim while passing through Hudson, WI. Took me straight back to my local London pub. A fabulous English bitter, punishing Crystal hops. I remember calling it stifling, but I love a tastebud-challenger. A classic style of beer, one that would never take hold in this country, but a terrific homage to the best of our friends across the pond.

Upon reading month's reviews, the real worst beer of the month: Spanish Peaks Honey Raspberry Ale. Given to me for free at Heritage Liquor in Maplewood, and for good reason. Side note: if you've never been to Heritage, go after reading this. Friendliest and most helpful service of any store in the area. Great guys who know their beer and give outstanding recommendations. Anyway. This beer was intended to go to any one of the non-serious beer drinking females present at a work gathering. Ended up coming home with me, where it sat for weeks until I bit the bullet. Tasted like flat sparkling water that had been forgotten in a car trunk for a summer. I shudder even thinking about it.

August will most certainly bring more new beers to my collection: I leave Monday for Colorado, where I've planned Oskar Blues, Avery, Boulder and Left Hand trips, as well as the side stops at brewpubs and west-friendly beer stores. My buds are ready.

Hitachino Nest Japanese Classic Ale

2009-07-15T17:53:00.004-05:00

Brewery: Kiuchi Brewery, Ibaraki, Japan

Style: English IPA

ABV: 7.5%

Rating: 4 stars

80 degrees. Sun. Work done. Aromatic dinner cooking. Wife addressing neglected cleaning.

It'd be hard to get a bum rating tonight. And this one's even been aged in cedar casks...OOH!! D0 they decide to put statements like that on the label thinking the average (or above average) beer drinker will pick up on the cedar aging? I find it hard to detect, but let's find out if I can.

Nice cloudiness to the appearance--like an orange kickball that's been dirtied up for a summer. Strong, persistent head and lacing. Has the looks of a serious, sturdy brew.

Ok. The cedar is apparent in the smell. I would never have pegged it had they not blatantly labeled it so, but they win this battle I guess. There's a richness to the aroma as well; a roundness of yeast, malt and hops that says 'I ain't no Asahi, baby!'

Man, this beer is spicy. First thoughts upon tasting. Not clove or coriander, closer almost to pepper actually. Guess what else is there. Wood. My guess: cedar. Let's offshoot. If wood makes food taste better (planked salmon, etc.) and adds flavor to beer, what else could it improve? Honestly, how often have you been doing something and thought, "you know, a little wood would really set this off." Are we sure this beer's only 7%? I feel like it's taking me farther.

I'm often too cheap to buy more than one of a beer, especially in this case, where at four bucks a pop I wanted to sample as many as I could, but I wish I'd have gotten two of these. Twelve ounces goes by so fast. I wrote that having finished eleven of the twelve, but the twelfth ounce was by far the most intense. Seemingly half of the cedar spice settled at the bottom, and if all of the beer tasted like the last swig, I'd have a lesser opinion. A bitter bludgeon of sting.

With that said, I still enjoyed this immensely, and give it above average marks on both mouthfeel and drinkability on top of the points for uniqueness and its ability to send me into a state where I might use the phrase "planked salmon."

The Lake Effect

2009-07-12T09:30:00.004-05:00

Beer pilgrimages are hot right now, but since I have neither the money to pull one off or a willing tagalong wife, I will be making none anytime soon. The best I could do was turn a week at the in laws lake cabin (with a wedding pit stop in Chicago) into my own beer quest. The best I could do.

The Chicago hurdles:

1. Money. Man, beer is not cheap, and when you've got one shot to stock up in Chicago, things can get ugly quickly. I tried to let myself splurge, but there were other factors against me as well.

2. Disappointing liquor stores. There are some good ones in Chicago, no doubt, but the northwest suburbs are shockingly bad. Trust me, I mapped this one out. Though I guess if you got stuck in the wrong part of the Twin Cities, you could be stymied too. I was relegated to a mega-chain, Binny's, which I'd equate to an MGM.

3. No singles. This was the biggest blow. Six pack or bust at Binny's, with an ok selection of big bottles. I've grown so accustomed to making my own six packs--it was like being in a liquor store for the first time again. I had no choice but to get a six pack of Three Floyds Alpha King, picked up a couple other big bottles of TF and Lost Abbey and I was at my budget. There were dozens of beers I would have liked to sample, but it's hard to commit to a bunch of unknown sixers. I even asked the manager if he would split up some six packs for me (something I've done numerous times here without issue) since I was from out of town. Denied.

The successes:

1. Wisconsin gas stations. Can you imagine? Beer-stocked gas stations? A traveler's dream. I loaded up on New Glarus (how many wheat beers do they make?) on the way to Chicago and picked up an assortment of goodies (including NG Wisconsin Belgian Red) on the way back to the cabin.

2. The Mitsuwa Marketplace in Arlington Heights, IL. I assumed this blip on my beer map would be a hole-in-the-wall type strip mall joint. Quite wrong was I. Truly a marketplace, Mitsuwa was the size of a Wal-Mart, complete with a bookstore, salon, food court, grocery store and yes, a liquor store. The Asian beer selection was the best I've seen, and the sake options were out of control. I'm not a big sake guy, but I had to try one. Now I'm an even smaller sake guy unfortunately. I did manage to pick up a nice assortment of beers, including a few with no English on them. Still trying to figure out how to rate those.

3. The Lake Effect. The title track. It's tradition to spend the entire week of July 4 at the lake, and I was triple-digit stocked in good beer for the week. Maybe it's the relaxation; no work stresses, no home maintenance. Maybe it's the perfect lake-breezed weather we had all week. Maybe it's something I can't put my finger on. Clearly I can't. But whatever it is, everything seems to taste a bit better at the lake. I cracked my first Alpha King at the lake. It was perfect. I've since had a couple more, and they were just stellar. The scary Belgian Red was a huge hit among even the macro drinkers. I even enjoyed my first ever Stroh's on a dusk fishing outing.

In all, I added 16 new beers to my tally over those ten days, and I can't help but wonder: how would these beers rate in my kitchen or living room? I'd wager they'd lose a half star on average.

Point Counterpoint: Count Beer Festival Samples?

2009-06-17T18:24:00.004-05:00

I've argued this in my head dozens of times. Is a 2 oz sample of a beer at a beer festival enough to consider that beer tried? Had? Consumed? Rate-able? What if you have two 2 oz samples? One right after the other. Or hours apart. Where is the cutoff? What if you're hammered? What if your writing's illegible? Why does it matter, it's only a personal quest anyway. Or is it? Are there unwritten rules or guidelines? Will I be outcast for improperly counting a beer as consumed and reviewed?

Like I said, I've had this conversation many times. Shall we take the questions one at a time?

In general, I say no. A 2 oz sample of a beer is not sufficient enough to officially (or unofficially) count. As far as the double sample goes, I'm less sure. Which is why I abide by the rule in my official journal that samples at a festival go in a separate category that goes uncounted in the year-end or lifetime tally.

Case in point: the 2009 City Pages Beer Fest, otherwise known as the biggest sanctioned college binge drinking session of the year. I shudder at calling this a real beer festival, but let's not be snobby now. It's somewhat of a gateway festival.

So why do beer samples at an event like this not make the cut? Shall we bullet point this?

1. Size matters. It's hard to get much depth out of a 2 oz sample, which is the only reason you need to not count them. You can usually tell if you'd like the beer or not, but it barely gets you two swigs worth. And forget about sticking your nose to the bottom of the plastic cup to garner worthwhile smell notes.
2. Samples are inconsistent. Some come from warm bottles. Bad pours. Cashed kegs. At an event like this, it's about speed for the pourer, not consistency.
3. Escalating intoxication. Three hours in, maybe that Michelob Honey Wheat (which I sampled) doesn't taste as bad as it did the first time. And maybe your buds are too shot to appreciate the step up from a Cold Spring Red River Trail Ale to a Sierra Nevada Southern Hemisphere Harvest.
4. Volunteers know nothing. Pour. Repeat. It's your job to figure out exactly what you're getting. I've had several occasions where the beer I'm told I'm drinking doesn't exist. See: Davis Hempinstein Ale.
5. Note-taking logistics. Drunken scribble on a damp napkin oftentimes doesn't look quite as clear the next day.

There probably are more reasons, but I don't think I need any. Maybe you've got additional ones, and I'd like to hear them. And if you'd argue that you can count these samples, I'd like to hear that argument as well.

Some fests, however, are plenty sufficient. Take Al's Blue Nile events, for instance. Even with a three-beer sampler, you get enough volume of each to have a clear idea of the beer's characteristics. Now, attending this event after you've spent all afternoon at the City Pages binger might not give you the clearest beer-rating head, but it does guarantee some interesting descriptions.

Of the 17 new beers I tried at the City Pages fest, I gave only five an above-average rating:

Sierra Nevada Southern Hemisphere Harvest (4 stars)
Big Sky IPA (4)
Widmer Brothers Drifter Pale Ale (3.5)
Lagunitas A Little Sumpin' Sumpin' Ale (3.5)
Rock Bottom Minneapolis Hopfen Konig IPL (3.5)

The Rock Bottom garner that rating simply because of the unique concept: they used an IPA recipe but substituted lager yeast. This is the kind of thing I'd like to see more of now that the jack-up-the-hops fetish has peaked. Let me see some innovation.

I've since had full pours of both the Sierra Nevada (on tap at Buster's on 28th) and Lagunitas (bottle from Heritage Liquor in Maplewood) and stuck by my initial ratings on both. Which brings the question back to the forefront: if my hazy, buzzed analysis is confirmed upon a full tasting, should more respect be given to the validity of festival samples?

Well, in certain cases, maybe. I speak mainly of the worst of the worst. The beers I'll never willingly try again, but deserve to be mentioned. Mentioned, that is, for their crimes. There were also five of those that Saturday afternoon (no links. If you want to research them, do so on your own):

Bohemia Clasica
Big Hold Headstrong Pale Ale
Cold Spring Red River Trail Ale
Michelob Honey Wheat
Moosehead Beer

There were perhaps a dozen more at least that I didn't have the chance to sample, including the certain abomination, Moosehead Light. Perhaps my head may have exploded upon that tasting. Also worth mentioning is Cold Spring's Honey Almond Weiss, which my counterpart could not finish. Keep in mind, these are 2 oz samples.

So can I count these? Please? I wouldn't mind the additional tallies, and it's likely I'll never have the chance to try them again. Still, the fairness-in-beer-tasting side of my brain says no. If you can't count the good, uncounted too go the bad.

Guess I know which crappy 12 packs I'll be buying for the next softball games.

Town Hall Duo

2009-06-03T18:48:00.003-05:00

Though I live in Minneapolis, I don't make it to the best local brewpub, Minneapolis Town Hall Brewery, nearly enough. This is something I've been saying I need to change for four years now. Nice atmosphere, new beers virtually every week, good food if you're interested. Luckily, I was able to find my way there twice in the past four days, and though I enjoyed only one beverage each time, both stops were well worth the barely ten minutes it takes me to get there. Plus, I FINALLY got to try the much ballyhooed Mango Mama, which has eluded me for all these years.

I stopped in Saturday afternoon with a California uncle (who has more Town Hall paraphernalia than I do), and both of us decided to try the seasonal cherry ale. Good reviews from the bartender. Won't get bad reviews from me, but I'd put them a half-star short of good. On the spectrum of cherry beers I've had, this one fits right about in the middle when it comes to both tartness and enjoyment. If a Belgian kriek is a ten on the tart scale, this one would be about a four I'd say, but it's not nearly as sweet as the sweetest of girly fruit beers I've had. And when you can compare every cherry beer you ever have to Sam Adams Cherry Wheat, nothing looks that bad.

Fairly easy to drink, especially on a sunny afternoon. Bonus points for drinkability perhaps, but I don't think I'd say I'd order another if I was presented with other options. Cherries were about the only detectable flavor, though, and while I can appreciate a delicate summer ale, I usually am looking for more of a kick. This was simply the appetizer for a huge day of beer. Did its job.

Tuesday evening, however, on a whim, I found myself back on the 7 Corner patio with a friend I wanted to introduce to the Minneapolis brewpub scene. Since we both work in St. Paul, and there are a handful of great beer options within a stone's throw of the 9-5, we rarely cross the river. Plus, there's this weird deal where people from St. Paul DO NOT venture into Minneapolis. Only out of necessity. I'm not a lifelong Minneapolitan, so I have no problems splitting my time, but seriously, weren't they ever curious? Didn't they ever see a restaurant review that intrigued them? No trips to the record stores? The coffee shops? The garage sales? Anything? This is a chapter in a book I'm not writing.

Anyway, I was expecting to enjoy a Cascale Ale, their first in a series of single hopped beers intended to help drinkers identify their favorite hop varieties. A nice idea. To my surprise, Mango Mama appeared on the whiteboard draught list! I was shocked enough that I yelled to the loitering waitresses as we walked in, embarassing my already hesitant St. Paulite companion.

I love the original Masala Mama, but had heard from various sources that the Mango tops it. The trouble is, it's rarely around for more than a day (Monday) and I haven't been able to find my way there in time to get one before. This was my night.

There was a tiny problem in this plot: I don't like mangoes. Don't hate them, but would never buy one. Is it perhaps because my wife is allergic to them? Doesn't help. But no, mangoes just don't do it for me. I'd rather have a pineapple, but there is no Pina Mama.

I'm living proof that you need not like mangoes to love the hell out of a Mango Mama. The sweetness was definitely present in the smell, but danced nicely with the bitter hops I associate with the Masala. And the sweet mango bounces off your lips instantly. Lingers for a bit, and then gives way to a majestic mouth-sweep of bitterness. It's interesting to read the reviews of this one, because half of them say the mango dominates, and half say the hops balance it out at the end. Place me squarely in the second camp. I did not think the mango was overbearing. At all.

This was a beer I wanted to make last two days. How good was it, you ask? With one solid swig left in my goblet, a moth found its way into my remaining suds and was unable to hoist itself out. I thought about it for a while, at first resigning myself to giving away that final sip, but then deciding I would be doing the beer an injustice by not finishing it. I have no fear of moths, but it's no fun fishing one out of a beer. But it had to be done. My companion agreed. After all, there haven't been any diagnosed cases of Moth Flu yet, have there?

About This Beer Drinking Thing

2009-05-25T19:36:00.003-05:00

Only 15 months into my serious beer drinking/logging/writing phase of life, and man, it's grueling.

I just want to drink beer.

Obviously, I've fallen dangerously far off the beer bloggin wagon, but I think I can get myself back on. But recently, I've had much more trouble finding complete satisfaction at the bottom of a once filled glass of suds. And I've had little luck finding exquisite, affordable, available beers, and thus have found myself resorting more and more to old favorites. Your Summit, your Surly. Hence, the stalled blog. With the drought, apparently, also come those words you almost need to follow with a sigh. Hence (sigh), thus (sigh).

Man, life is tough when you just drink beer and can't get yourself to write about it. I need a beer.

I have had my share of beer in the past few weeks, though much of it now comes in the softball field parking lot. Those beers, as you might imagine, don't inspire much reflection. Would I love to introduce the guys to the finer brews? Absolutely. I think, however, some of the experience gets lost when you're standing on a sunflower seed-filled tar slab in your sweaty mesh splendor.

As for the non-softball imbibing, here's a list. Finally had a Pauwel Kwak (it's the one that gets served in the goofy glass). Liked it. Part of the fun of drinking a Kwak is the glass, and I'd bet its overall ratings would fall a tiny bit if it came in a pint glass. Just my opinion. Well hidden 8% ABV. Strong spicy Belgian flavors.

Boulevard. Bought the sampler pack (6 varieties, of which I've now tried 4). From best to worst: Single Wide IPA, Pale Ale, Lunar Ale, Zon. I've expounded on this before, but I've backed off the hyper IPAs to the more modest ones, and the Single Wide fits the bill. Nice grapefruit aroma, really delicate piney hops, without the syrupy butterness that comes with the next category.

The Double IPAs. Had Founders Double Trouble (finished its sentence in my basement) and Dark Horse Double Crooked Tree IPA (a limited release, you know...) Talk to me again in November, maybe I'll be ready for these bad boys again. I mean, these are two excellent beers, that on the right day, I could see myself recommending to the highest degree. Just not on these days. I will say, I opened the Founders at the wrong time (well after midnight). I still appreciate these beers; love the smell, love the first touch of the lips, but a whole bottle can be a little much. The same could be said for the Double Crooked Tree, but man, how can you pass up a 13.6% IPA? Even if it sucked I'd have to try one. I actually liked it better than the Founders, thought it was balanced better, especially considering the extra jolt of alcohol. Neither tasted too boozy, either, which was surprising. Again, check back with me around November.

Two Southern Tiers: Uber Sun and Big Red. I'd just like to see Southern Tier do a subtle beer. Just once. I don't understand an imperial summer wheat ale. Not refreshing enough to be a summer guzzler, not tasty enough to be a strong ale sipper. As for Big Red, it was tasty, but was hopped out of its mind. This was a red ale like Samuel Adams Imperial Pilsner is a pilsner. Show me something a little more delicate.

Yes I'm a tad bitter. I need some good summer beers to bring me back. Suggestions?

Catching Up

2009-04-29T17:54:00.004-05:00

I wish I could say my neglect of this blog has no correlation to my beer consumption, but sadly, it's direct. Money's going elsewhere, time's being split and I'm once again undergoing a mini-cleanse. I did manage to find a quiet night for the Russian River Consecration I scored from my uber-generous Uncle Mike. A beautiful beer, one that both Kristie and I enjoyed, but one that I simply can't find enough fitting words to review. Maybe someday. It wasn't my favorite beer of the year, but had I had it as one of my first sours, it probably would be. Follow? Anyway, the fact that it had 10% ABV completely blew my mind. Drinking the whole bottle would be quite literally like drinking an entire bottle of wine. Thankfully, Kristie helped out a bit, though I wasn't a huge fan of sharing. A rare treat I hope to enjoy again someday.

Summit Horizon Red Ale

Brewery: Summit, St. Paul, MN

Style: Amber Ale

ABV: 5.7%

Rating: 3.5 stars

New full time release by Summit, had to give it an early test run. Smell reminded me instantly of Bell's Two Hearted, which is always a good sign. The blunt American hops never fail to please. Taste, however, wasn't quite as wonderous. I guess I prefer something a bit more lively, such as the Two Hearted, and this one settles in a little hard for my palate. Maybe that's why I'm not generally a huge fan of ambers. Not lively enough to satisfy my most loyal taste buds, and not full enough to smooth my mouth and stomach with chewy goodness. If you're not following this, I'm not either, so don't worry about it.

Essentially, if I'm going to grab a pint of Summit or pick up a six pack, I still probably lean toward the classic EPA. Never disappoints. The Horizon Red isn't good enough for me to chew on one all evening, and it isn't drinkable enough for me to want to drink six of 'em. Not the most glowing of reviews I suppose.

It took me six months, but you can only hold down a music junkie for so long. And after a dreadful 2008, I'm back on the pulse and enjoying quite a few things these days in the music world. So here's a tiny taste of my picks for the first third of 2009

Rock Compilation Album Division: Dark Was the Night. Running unopposed. Quite a few solid tracks on this AIDS benefit album. Here's my quick list:
"Knotty Pine," Dirty Projectors and David Byrne
"Cello Song," The Books featuring Jose Gonzalez
"Train Song," Feist and Ben Gibbard
"So Far Around the Bend," The National
"Sleepless," The Decemberists
"Hey Snow White," The New Pornographers

But the disc's brightest star is Sufjan Stevens covering the Castanets' "You Are the Blood." Intoxicating.

Concept Rock Opera Album Division: "The Hazards of Love," The Decemberists. Again, pretty much unopposed. Don't love it, but it has its moments, and the thought of devising an entire work of this confusion and depth from one 60s vocal piece is astounding.

Pitchfork Retro Tech Lite Rock Division: "Daniel," Bat For Lashes

Afro Pop Division: "Sabali," Amadou and Mariam

Canadian Synth Pop Division: "Gimme Sympathy," Metric

Obligated by Previous Work Division: "The Palace at 4 a.m.," A.C. Newman

Revenge of the French Pop Rock Division: "1901," Phoenix

Won't elaborate on those, but check 'em out if you wish. More beer SOON.

April's Fools and Finds

2009-04-05T09:31:00.008-05:00

My latest batch of samplings has been incredibly polar. In the past week, I've added two five-stars to my tally (giving me ten out of my 360 rated beers), but have also been let down and borderline disgusted by a couple others. No more intro time wasted here. First the misses.

Tyranena Paradise by the Dashboard Lights

Brewery: Tyranena, Lake Mills, Wisconsin

Style: Imperial Porter

ABV: 7.5%

Rating: 3 stars

Don't confuse: I'm all about imperial porters, and I think we'll be seeing more of them soon. Here are the issues. I've noticed with Tyranena beers more than any other that the bottled versions fall far short of their draught counterparts. This was the case with Hop Whore, Scurvy, and now Paradise. Though I haven't had it on tap, I imagine it is much livelier, as the others were. In a bottle, it bogs you down.

Perhaps my taste buds weren't firing this particular night, or perhaps I had unfair expectations of the cherry aspect of this beer, but I didn't find it. And this from a Brewers Gone Wild! beer? I thought subtlety was an afterthought in this series.

More troubling was the beer's deterioration throughout the drinking process. I would given it a far more favorable rating if I'd only had a 4 oz sample, but by the last few gulps, this one had lost most of its bite. Got flat and dull on me.

This is one I'd try again, because I want to like it. Rather, I want to not dislike it.

Left Hand Juju Ginger

Brewery: Left Hand, Longmont, Colorado

Style: Herb/Spice Beer

ABV: 4%

Rating: 1.5 stars

On tap at the Happy Gnome. I am a huge ginger guy, love to use it when I cook, love me some ginger ale, ginger beer. I like ginger. Naturally, I was intrigued by a beer that substitutes freshly ground ginger root in place of half the hops.

Results were not favorable on this day. It smelled good, with major ginger punch bursting through. Big ginger is fine in the aroma, but it was too much for me when it came to the actual taste. It felt halfway between a natural ginger beer or real ginger ale and a beer with ginger notes. Not quite as refreshing as the former, not as punchy as the latter. I guess I'd rather have a full commitment. I want either a non-alcoholic, beautifully blended ginger ale or a satisfying, quenching beer with some ginger notes added. That's just me, I guess.

Now, the successes.

Surly 16 Grit

Brewery: Surly, Brooklyn Center, Minnesota

Style: Imperial IPA

ABV: 9%

Rating: 5 stars

Putting this tasting off for a while, for reasons unknown. Maybe because I'm a bit tired of hop juggernauts these days. Everyone's doing a double IPA, and it's not hard to please me. I'd like to be a little more discerning. With that said, I imagined it would be hard for me to not like this beer. Surly, at this point, gets the benefit of the doubt on just about everything they do, and they deserve it.

The amarillo hops were beautiful in this one, and while I'm not too familiar with glaciers or warriors, I can't help but think they helped as well. I liked this one initially, but had fallen heavy for it by the end of the glass. If you can work me from a 4- to a 5-star in one tasting, you've earned that rating.

I particularly enjoyed the finish. Dry enough to make me want another sip, but not dry enough to suck the life from my mouth. I enjoy both, but I felt it balanced better without the big back end grab. There's still room in my beer log for double IPAs, it seems, and this one got me in just the right frame of mind to crack open

Russian River Pliny the Elder

Brewery: Russian River, Santa Rosa, California

Style: Double IPA

ABV: 8 %

Rating: 5 stars

Had this for a month or so, and I had been saving it for the perfect occasion. First, I thought the Gophers NCAA tournament game would suffice, but I found myself not in the mood. And I didn't see any worthy moments on the horizon, so last night became the night. Perhaps the 16 Grit restored my confidence in the style.

Now, Pliny, based on reputation, is both blessed and damned. I guess I'd generally call it one of the 25 or 30 highest-rated beers on earth. Thus, you know it's good. A beer with that many ratings isn't in that position by accident. However, it's a bit unfair to expect a brew to be the best you've ever had and build it up as such for the year before you get to try it. In a way, I wish the ratings were only available after you've rated it. If that were the case, though, I'd probably never try this one because the legend wouldn't exist in my mind.

So I tried to go into the bottle with as open a mind as possible.

The aroma emanates as soon as the cap pops, and I'm instantly swept away to a land of hyperbole and bow-down-edness. Impossible for me to smell those grapefruit hops and not crumble. Pliny has the look of a beer unparalleled in its freshness. Extremely lively carbonation, and the color was much brighter than most DIPAs I've seen. Plus, the bottle gives it that extra boost of class. Nothing flashy; plain colors, text and design. We don't need a fancy label. We're Pliny the Elder.

Balance is the key separation between the DIPA men and the boys. Pliny dove in as syrup, a sweet creamy smooth thing, only to bite the roof of your mouth as soon as you feel comfortable. I love that bitter drag--takes that sweet syrup right away. The round flavor left me wanting nothing.

Or does Pliny get a boost because it is so highly-rated? If I blind taste-tested this next to, say, a Goose Island Imperial IPA or a Dark Horse Double Crooked Tree IPA, would I be able to sense the difference? I think, because of the modest alcohol content, I would. The trend is to beef these babies up as much as possible. The Double Crooked Tree is a prime example, with the ABV at an astonishing 13.6%. At that point, haven't you become something other than an IPA?

That's the beauty of Pliny the Elder. Its 8% content is perfect. Not arrogant in either direction. Enough alcohol to feel, but not to the point that it dominates the taste.

After tasting, I had to reflect. What constitutes a five-star beer, and does this qualify? I decided it was definitely one of the ten best beers I've had, and that makes it deserving. What's the point in having five-star beers if you never give them out? Ten out of 360 (less than 3%) is a good rate for five-stars. Besides, who is the rating for? This blog? My records? Who cares? I loved this beer, so five stars it is.

Founders Curmudgeon Old Ale

2009-03-31T19:04:00.003-05:00

Brewery: Founders, Grand Rapids, Michigan

Style: Old Ale

ABV: 9.8%

Rating: 4.5 stars

Had a crabby day at work today, so I commiserated with a fellow curmudgeon. I've stepped away from the finer beers of late, substituting pound-able but passable basketball-watching suds instead. I'm also going through this phase where I'm overly possessed with proving to myself that I can go a night or two or three without a beer, and my tasting and rating has suffered immensely. Sadly, one of the only new beers I've tried in the last couple weeks was a Heineken Light. I guess I didn't taste much of a difference.

Anyway, this experiment has had a couple side effects. I feel fine on those nights I choose (practically force myself) not to enjoy a brew or two, and know I can do it. Stage one of alcoholism passed swimmingly. However, once I've tallied a few days of sobriety, I cut loose. For example, this past Friday was a forgettable and largely forgotten binge of garbage calories that led to a stone sober Saturday, which nobody wants. With that said, I feel great during the week. There's a void when it comes to finding a sense of accomplishment or achievement at work, so the sobriety, I guess, substitutes.

Am I doing this for health reasons? To slow the inevitable sinking of the gut? Or am I out to prove to myself that I still have willpower--that I can ignore the 30 delectable treats staring at me each day I come home? And if I'm flushing it all away when I am satisfied with the fasting, was the fasting worth it? I go back and forth, but right now, I'm back to where I feel I can treat myself nightly, and plan on starting tonight with this Founders.

I've a brain that rarely powers down, but this Curmudgeon should help.

The appearance is akin to the most pleasing barleywines; ruby turning to magenta to caramel. Not much head, and none of it lasts. When I swirl the glass, it rocks like a relaxes quickly, and doesn't seem like it will coat my mouth so that dinner winds up with a curmudgeonly aftertaste.

It's a bully of a sniffer. I dove in a half dozen times and each time found another layer. It's geekily layered; a Sufjan Stevens tune and a David Lynch flick. (Side note: you see what happens when I realize I'm no good at picking out specifics in a beer. I resort to wild metaphors and pointless side notes.) I'll try. There's brandy. Port wine. Obvious alcohol presence indeed. Sweet, intensely sweet, and more than just the clumped-together dark fruits and caramel. It smells stiff and warm, but has the life that a big stout might not.

I hoped the taste would recall memories of Bell's Third Coast Old Ale, and it does. It's just a beauty of a beer. Barleywine-ish? Yes, but this Old Ale business makes it sound so much more majestic and regal. The caramel (word of the review) stick is there, and it gets better as the beer gets warmer. Beer drinking for dummies advice of the day: let the beer warm. Drinking a beer at different temperatures is revealing and rewarding. There's the alcoholic surge that must exist in a nearly 10% beer, but it's delicately disguised. I feel it, know it's there, but can't find it. It passes the chug test, too. Drinking this one sip to sip is great, but a giant swallow doesn't overwhelm.

So easy to drink, this one. I planned on it lasting me through dinner, and it would serve as a wonderful dessert drink, but I don't think it will make it to either. Luckily, I've got a Fuller's Vintage I think I might pop tonight as well. Not sure what it is about this old ales; it's the combination of potency, drinkability and mystique that has me ball and chain. This one is dragging me.

Beer Madness

2009-03-21T15:03:00.005-05:00

A full Saturday of basketball (after a full Thursday and Friday) seemed like the perfect time to spend a day boozing and blogging. You've heard of beer pairings with food, but today I'll be pairing beer with basketball, taking into consideration how my brackets shape up as the day progresses. Low percent hoppers when things are looking up, bog-downing stouts when the brackets kick me in the pants.

1:13 pm: After UCLA was blitzed by Villanova, I felt like punishing myself for overvaluing tournament guile and senior guards. No worse punishment than a lukewarm Bud Lite courtesy of a fridge-emptying friend. Off to a blazing start.

2:52 pm: Memphis/Maryland looks to be a blowout, but we've got UConn/Texas A&M on tap, with a diehard A&M fan on hand. Looking for something lightish but with some flavor to pick me up after a couple BL smoothies. Grab a Sam Adams White Ale from the mini fridge.

3:24 pm: Memphis 53, Maryland 33. UConn 29, Texas A&M 11. Games aren't shaping up as we'd like, so we've entered a pact to try as many different beers today as we possibly can. The three of us have each already tallied three, and there are serious talks of hitting a dozen. Meanwhile, the White Ale doesn't deliver what I expected it to, but recently my witbiers have been spicier than they have fruity. This is definitely more fruit than spice. Everything is subtle. It is refreshing, but in this couched-out, flatscreen basement, it's hard to get into a summer beer mood.

4:42 pm: Tipoff between Purdue and Washington, the most anticipated game of the session. Pairing that with a Southern Tier IPA. I picked up this one in Hudson, WI, because for some reason, the 12 oz Southern Tier beers don't come to Minnesota. We only get the big bottles, which are generally outstanding, but I wanted to try one of their standard offerings. Fundamentally sound game, sound balanced beer. Has a nice earthy quality that balances out the hops quite well.

With each of us starting our fourth beer, the prop bets/side action is picking up. We've agreed on ten pushups per dunk, and money has begun to make its way out into the open, a visible tease for any potential gambler.

5:04 pm: Almost done with the IPA. This one's smooth and drinkable. Too drinkable for a basement dudefest.

5:12 pm: Three consecutive Blake Griffin dunks in the Oklahoma/Michigan test. 30 pushups. Pretenders falling to the side of the road.

5:15 pm: Beer's flowin', pushups galore. Dudes posing in the mirror. Gettin' crazy at 5:15.

5:30-6:15 pm: MGD buffer.

6:38 pm: Beer #7: Stella Artois. Not a favorite, but running out of options to get to 12. Saving the good stuff for the gourmet dinner.

7:29 pm: Beer #8: Summit IPA. Not the hoppy California style IPA, this Euro recipe is meatier, creamier and sturdier. If you can allow yourself to break free of the hopped-out IPA mindset, it's a good sipper.

Monday evening: Never made it to 12 beers.

The Best of Late

2009-03-12T13:29:00.014-05:00

Been watching too much basketball lately to dedicate time to post. This doesn't mean I've slacked on the consumption. My stash is dwindling, though, and I want to make it last as long as I can, so I've been leaning toward the wines and the liquors more as of late. With that said, I've had some great beers recently, including a well-respected beer that didn't disappoint. Here's a
mini rundown of the best stuff I've had recently.

New Glarus Wisconsin Belgian Red

Brewery: New Glarus, New Glarus, Wisconsin

Style: Fruit Beer

ABV: 5.1%

Rating: 5 Stars

One of the best beers in the Midwest, and certainly the best fruit beer available. I imagined it would be akin to a Belgian kriek-like cherry bomb. Quite wrong I was. New Glarus uses one pound of Wisconsin cherries for each bottle (not your 12 oz. sixer bottle, mind you) and it's evident in the pungent aroma.

I was slightly worried when I realized this wasn't going to be as tart as the sour beers, because I typically loathe cherry-flavored things. In fact, the Sam Adams Cherry Wheat was one of my least favorite beers I tried in 2008. But this cherry was different. It had immense sweetness, but not like a Popsicle or sucker. It was sweet like the gooey inside-the-pie cherries, a real richness that couldn't be faked by synthetic flavoring. There was enough tartness to keep the sweetness at bay, though, and the late sparkle scraped my mouth so that I was ready for another sip.

Kristie and I enjoyed this one together, and it's exciting to me that I now have a better grip on the types of beers she might enjoy. I wish they didn't cost $10 a bottle, but it's exponentially better to enjoy a beer with company.

This beer (and the myriad of other New Glarus crafts) are well worth the 45-minute drive to Wisconsin, and I plan on making semi-regular trips from here on out.

New Glarus Crack'd Wheat

Brewery: New Glarus, New Glarus, Wisconsin

Style: American Pale Wheat Ale

ABV: 5.95%

Rating: 4 Stars

Prior to my whimsical February jaunt to Hudson, I'd had only one New Glarus beer--the infamous Spotted Cow. Thought it was below average and not worthy of the hype I'd heard from my Madison brethren. I had no idea they had as expansive a line of reign-free beers as they do. This one sounded interesting, and both employees said they'd had it and were pleasantly surprised.

It's an interesting idea. It is, basically, a wheat beer. But it's also dry-hopped with amarillo hops. To dry-hop a beer means to introduce hops after the fermentation has begun. It's a way to give the beer an extra hop kick and bring out the characteristics of the specific hops used. It's a pretty common tactic, but this is the first I'd heard about a wheat beer being dry-hopped. Though gimmicky, the idea sounded quite interesting to me, especially because wheat beers generally all get lumped into the same clovey/spicy/orange-peely heap for me.

It tastes exactly how you would imagine. The smell is all spicy wheat, and wheat is obviously the base of the beer. But the amarillo hops kick in toward the middle of each gulp and leave the beer's lasting impression. The beer is bottle-conditioned, another common brewing practice meaning the beer finishes the fermentation process in the bottle. Always a plus, and it usually guarantees a large frothy head, which I happen to enjoy.

Potentially the perfect summer beer, though later tonight I plan to enjoy their Berliner Weiss, which I've heard is phenomenal. Light as a wheat with the bold hops of a pale ale. I foresee many more of these come July.

Stone IPA

Brewery: Stone, Escondido, California

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 6.9%

Rating: 4.5 Stars

It's all basically been said about IPAs. We love the citrus, love the dryness, love the hops, love the mouthfeel. This is no different, and it's an excellent representation of the style. I know I've had it in the past, before my tastes were honed, so I wasn't surprised to like it again. Had to go to Wisconsin to get it, which makes no sense to me.

Tuesday Night Hop Battle

2009-03-03T20:10:00.008-06:00

Drank not a drop Sunday or Monday. In this economy, as is the catch phrase, a two-day hiatus deserves a reward. Since I'm a hop guy, I decided to try a couple of the hoppier options in my collection.

First, the Lagunitas Hop Stoopid. Lagunitas, as of a year ago, was fairly limited in Minnesota. Or maybe I just wasn't noticing them. Recently, however, their brews have been popping up everywhere. I liked the IPA, was lukewarm on the Brown Shugga, and could not handle the Maximus IPA.

The Hop Stoopid was the best of the bunch so far. The aroma represented everything I love about juicy hopped-up beers. The pungent citrus, in this case grapefruit and a strong passion fruit presence, gets me revved up to swig. I really took a deep sniff at this one, because I knew I grabbed something specific (the passion fruit), but it took me a while to realize exactly which of the 'fruit cocktail' canned fruits it was. For once, I knew I had a smell nailed, and it comes from 2.5 years at a preschool. Good-sized head on this one, with the lacing disappearing more than some. Looks like orange jello, which again, I can attribute to preschool experience.

The taste was exceptional. Big and sturdy on the front end, with the citrus holding sway. The key, though, was the back, when everything felt like it was being sucked out of your mouth and down the hatch via the bitterness. My mouth was full one second and dry, sticky and empty the next. I love that in a beer. Give me some boom right away, take it away and leave me wanting more at the end of every sip. This beer is sharp like a nasty cheddar cheese.

As the glass emptied, I felt a bit more metal in every taste, but I think that had more to do with the compounding bitterness than the deterioration of the beer. Overall, this was one of the more satisfying beers I've had this year. I'd put it at the top of the hops, at least.

Next, Founders Centennial IPA. This much-heralded brewery does not sell its beers in Minnesota, and I am ashamed that it took me this long to cross the border into Wisconsin to buy some. Oh, the places you'll go! (Dr. Seuss' birthday yesterday).

Nearly all Founders brews come highly recommended, and Centennial is no different. To be fair to the Hop Stoopid, I should have opened the Founders Double Trouble, but I wasn't sure I could handle another double IPA. Unfortunately, the Centennial IPA couldn't match Hop Stoopid's power.

Lately I've been tasting a lot of what I can describe no better than dust. It tasted dusty. Maybe that means the flavors weren't as clear or crisp as I'd like. Maybe that means the mouthfeel was a little fuller and stretched farther into the buds than most. Or maybe it means that I got a peculiar amount of mothballs in the flavor. I swear I tasted mothballs.

Don't misconstrue those words. Mothballs, yes, but the flavor was still good.

Still. I'm finishing the glass as I write, and the dust factor overpowers everything else. I wish I could express it better. I guess I'll have to head east again, but a couple more bottles, and try them next to a more favorable competitor. In fairness, it probably would have stacked up well next to the Lagunitas Maximus, and maybe even the Lagunitas IPA. It just couldn't hang tonight.

Saturday Snippets

2009-03-01T18:01:00.006-06:00

I had been bracing myself for weeks for what was planned for last night: a trip into downtown Minneapolis' Shout House, one of my least favorite destinations in the cities. In fact, it's been quite a while since I've ventured downtown on a Saturday night; more recently than my college days, but not by much. It's just not a scene I particularly enjoy. So many obstacles. Who's driving? Where are you parking? Cab home? Bus? Designated Driver? How much is the cover? How packed will it be? And certainly not least of all, will there be any decent beer available? And no, Heineken doesn't count.

The Shout House specifically annoys me. I understand why it's a popular destination: Dueling pianos, rowdy atmosphere, central location. I just don't like paying eight bucks for the right to get sweaty waiting in line for a $6 Rolling Rock and be blown away by airplane-decibel, amusement park talent. Thus, to avoid tricky circumstances and careless spending, I volunteered to be the night's driver. I was ready for the challenge.

The call came at about 7:30 that the night's organizer had to bow out due to immanent illness. Since Kristie and I were already geared up for a night on the town, we didn't want it to go to waste. But without the ring leader, the Shout House was quickly eliminated from the itinerary.

After kicking around several potential destinations, we settled on the Lyndale/Lake St. part of town, where there are several decent options available. I was especially intrigued by the new sake brewery, Moto-i. Indeed, the first sake brewery anywhere in the world outside Japan. Reviews have seemed generally favorable and I knew their draught list was decent, so I imagined it might be an enjoyable and culturing experience.

We arrived about 9:30 to a fully-bellied bar and restaurant, and were told by the host we might be able to find a stray seat. We weren't, and were stuck in an awkward point of buoyancy; not committed enough to wedge our way between barstoolers, but not intending to order food and therefore denied a table upstairs. There was, however, a back room that was 75% empty. The tables were marked as reserved, but we asked the waitress if we could sit there anyway. She had no problem with it, but pointed us back to the host, who informed us that it was reserved for a private party. I said we would happily leave when the party arrived, but there were at least six available tables at the moment, and people were leaving the room already. Still he denied, with a half-assed smile and half-hearted apology. I guess I wouldn't turn away a customer these days, but that's me. I imagine if we had just sat down without asking, we would have been fine, but this is Minnesota, and people are generally accommodating if you ask.

We left, annoyed by insincere efforts and an overall haughty attitude by the hosts (there were at least three of them at the door). I hope this place succeeds, but it will not be because of my patronage. Shame.

We pressed on to the much more inviting, laid back vibe of the Herkimer. I often forget about the Herkimer as a local brewpub option, despite the fact that it's by far the closest to my house. Their beers are generally straight-forward and can be punchless, but they are interesting and a little more atypical than most. Plus, the food is outstanding (save the mini egg sandos). We had no problem ordering drinks, didn't feel uncomfortable standing around, and soon found ourselves a table, where we would be met by two friends.

I first tried the Alt, a style of beer that I'm utterly clueless about and formed no preconceived notions about appearance, smell or taste. I guess I'm still a bit unsure. Lighting is always an issue in a busy weekend bar scene, but the color appeared a bit coppery; not amber, but not pale either. They likened the beer on the menu to a German pale ale, and some of the classic German hoppiness was there, I guess. Overall, it was pretty bland. I wrote on a piece of scratch paper (I really need to be more prepared for these tastings), "very spiked dullness." Make of that what you will. It was like they wanted to blow dullness out of the park. Didn't leave much taste anywhere on the palate. I will say, however, as far as drinkability goes, it was a champion. Easily could have guzzled a few pints of these without thinking about it.

I moved next to the Sky Pilot Kellerbier, an unfiltered beer that I liked more than the Alt. Much more golden in color, with a much more present punch to all senses. Reminded me of their pilsner, but with a slightly more enjoyable hop for my taste. Good roundness in the mouth and carbonated well. Had a nice dry finish. Again, props to Herkimer for producing off-kilter beers and seemingly doing true versions of them. They are hard to place in my mental beer spectrum, and maybe I'm punishing them because I have no similar beers to compare them to. I really tried to figure out how to write the previous sentence with a preposition, but each version sounded laborious and unnatural. Does anyone follow that rule anyway?

Finally, we found ourselves at Bryant Lake Bowl, a Minneapolis legend and great spot to wind down for the night. They have a decent tap list, though I wish they had more seasonals. Kristie loves it because they have Ace Pear on tap (for $5.75, though!). I tried the Rogue seasonal, which the waitress called an anniversary beer. This is maybe my biggest beef with beer bars--not all, of course, and not every employee--but if you work at a place that could potentially attract beer geeks, you need to know the beers. I need to know the beers. When I had trouble pinpointing a Rogue Anniversary this morning, I called back to enquire further and was told it was the Rogue Anniversary Mogul.

This beer does not exist on Rogue's website. RateBeer has a Rogue Mogul Ale with 131 ratings, but the BeerAdvocate Mogul 2007 has just four. Still, Mogul is not listed on the brewery's website. Nevermind. Mogul Ale it is.

An American Strong Ale, apparently, and I'm not sure I like the style. It's sort of a wide category, though, but this one was malt heavy, and the sweetness that was prominent in my nostrils did not show up in my mouth. I was disappointed by that. For the malty power it had up front, it finished quite bitterly. It was a bit confusing to me. I like the dry, bitter aftertaste, but I don't know if I love it after such a hearty malt opening. I think most beer junkies would consider it the best beer I had all night, but I'd probably rather have the Herkimer Kellerbier.

Morals: Don't go to Moto-i expecting red carpet treatment. Don't go to the Herkimer expecting taste bud warfare. Don't go to Bryant Lake Bowl expecting precice beer identification. Go there, have a few decent, uncommon beers, relax, relax, and tip your waitress.

Blizzard Beer

2009-02-26T20:02:00.003-06:00

Every morning, say 10 am, I tell myself, 'self, tonight is the night you skip the beer and just drink water.' It's only a few hours later that the frustrations of the daily grind on the job force me to cave into the dozens of beers that will be staring me in the face when I arrive at home.

I try, I really do, but I don't feel much guilt over having a drink or two every night; I've gotten more consistent in the last year--no weeknight binge drinking anymore. It's difficult on nights like tonight, when the Gophers lose a winnable road game and I spent two hours trudging through slow traffic and shoveling the heartiest, stickiest snowfall of the season.

And on that note, I wondered, what would be the perfect beer for a blizzard? The initial response, clearly, would be to nurse a deep, warming imperial stout. Something to burn the insides and satisfy the thirsty taste buds. I had several stout options, including Victory's Storm King and Bell's Expedition. But I wasn't in the mood for a stout. Perhaps because I tried my namesake Nils Oscar Imperial Stout Tuesday night and was disappointed. (The second Nils Oscar beer disappointment I've had with no successes). I decided a stout was not the perfect blizzard beer.

I fingered through the basement options: some Surlys, Tyranenas, New Glaruses; nothing that felt right for the moment. Finally, I settled on a mini vertical of Sierra Nevada Bigfoots. I picked up '07 and '08 bottles when I visited Dennis Brothers in Cottage Grove in early January, and had been saving them for no particular reason. A vertical tasting means comparing the same beer from different years to see how the flavors have developed over time. Not all beers should be tasted this way. Don't save your Bud Lights for years to see how the flavors mature. But for a complex, stiff beer such as the Bigfoot can stand up to a few years of aging.

This was the first time I'd had Bigfoot in a bottle; I first had it on tap at the Muddy Pig in early 2008, when I gave it 4.5 stars. I think my love of barleywines peaked in those winter months, because I remember thinking Southern Tier's BackBurner was the best beer I'd ever had, and when I tried it a few months later I thought my initial five-star rating was much too high.

With that said, it's hard to argue with a barleywine during a wintery blizzard. It's a full beer in the mouth, leaving bold flavors behind without completely drying you out, and giving you enough alcohol burn to move you in a promising direction. Most might argue, and I would agree, that it doesn't give you the swig-to-swig satisfaction that an imperial stout does, but the flavors are prominent enough to make it its own course.

As for this blizzard, the Bigfoot delivered. It had a more bitter finish than I remembered, but when I checked my original notes from March 11, 2008, I found: "Alcohol is present, but taste is dominated by bitter, bitter hops."

The 2008: Supremely rich, with as full of a mouthfeel as you're going to get from a beer. I doesn't disappear down your throat, it stays awhile. The taste is nutty, strong and creamy, but with just the right amount of offsetting crispness. The finish is, again, quite bitter and dry. Many people cite this beer as one to cellar and save for a few years, but I, after having this one, think I might find it hard to do so.

The 2007: In fact, better than the 2008. Which leads me to believe that the longer you let this one ride, the better. Has the thick caramel coating that the 2008 had, but the flavor lasts incredibly long. I ate half a raw tomato in between gulps of this one, and I still couldn't shake the massive flavor. The alcohol is more present in the '07, which I don't mind, as it burned my throat quite pleasantly on this most wintery night. The lacing (foam that sticks to the side of the glass) is pronounced. It was nearly crust by the time I finished the brew. Lacing adds another aspect to the enjoyability of a beer, as you get to see the progress you've made from swallow to swallow as you make your way down the glass. Just another reason why it's crucial that beer be consumed from a glass (the correct glass) and not its original container.

Barleywines, as I'm coming to realize, are a style of beer that I like while I'm drinking them, but in the hours after the tasting, the beer settles in, and I realize that they should be judged not only while they're being chugged, but for hours after. These Bigfoots eased the pain of knowing another shovel was on the Friday morning horizon. Maybe I'll make it a tradition: keep a couple Sierra Nevada Bigfoots in the basement, and when radar says 5+ inches of snow, have them at the ready.

Surly Mild

2009-02-23T18:44:00.003-06:00

Had this on tap at the Blue Nile Saturday afternoon, the bridge between a weekend binge cleaning session and an extended family birthday gathering at the Mall of America. If you ask me, a beer or two is the least you can do to prepare for the megamall, as they say. Actually, it's probably not enough.

This was the first mild I'd had, though I can't quite be sure, because the style, from what I've gathered, is varied and the flavors many. I may have just broken an English language comma rule in that sentence. Anyway, this type of mild, the English Dark Mild variety, according to beeradvocate, is a British session beer characterized by low hops and low alcohol content. Well, if those are the conditions, Surly Mild qualifies.

To be fair, I dove into this one just after my first taste of a Surly Three, the third anniversary offering from the brewery. Three is classified as a braggot, brewed with 50% honey and 50% Munich malt, and let me be the whateverth person to say that the flavor is potent and delicious. In comparison, Surly Mild didn't stand much of a chance.

Maybe it was too early in the day (4:30ish), or maybe I was a bit too sick (stuffy nose), but I didn't get much aroma at all. Mild indeed. There certainly weren't a great deal of hops to wet my lips.

As for the taste, well, I can't much compare it to any other beer I've had, as it was markedly different. As a beer with 4.2% ABV, it lacked punch, but there was more taste than your average mass appeal 4.2% lager or ale. This is the part of the review where I'm reaching. I don't yet know enough about specific malts or how they taste, but what taste there was, I would surmise was due to the malts used. Al, when you read this, you can correct me. I got a very earthy vibe, not just the grassy hop flavor I get from many Euro beers, but soil and mineral flavors that give it a bit of depth without density.

Did I love this beer? No, certainly not. It's an easy drink, much easier than the palate-challenging beers we all love so dearly. And it doesn't make your face cringe like many low content beers would. It just doesn't have much to write home about. It's a bit plain.

So why does Surly make a beer like this? None of Surly's beers are mass appeal beers, I would argue, so they don't need to worry about pleasing a large sect of people. Mild isn't canned, and thus is available only to those diehards who seek it out. It certainly isn't a beer that would blow the diehards away. And frankly, it's not a beer I see the talented brewers at Surly finding enjoyment in pint after pint. I have one of these and think, OK, now I'd like to have any other Surly beer I've ever had.

Maybe it was a failed attempt. Maybe they wanted to show the Surly fans that they could make a simple, subtle beer. Certainly, not every beer a brewer tries can be better than the previous. And Surly has sort of dug their own grave on this one: why shouldn't a brewery be entitled to a couple duds? Mild isn't even a dud, but by their standards, it's pretty pedestrian. That doesn't change the fact that they've given us more than a handful of amazing beers.

Even so, there's a chance that Mild is a complete success. It's hard to imagine a beer more tightly fitting the name. I couldn't think of a better word for it, and by that standard, Surly Mild is a raging success.

Am I Strong Enough to Like a Bad Beer?

2009-02-21T08:53:00.008-06:00

I've struggled with this concept my entire life, really. Some may call it lack of self-confidence or conviction, or a reluctance to openly go against the popular opinions. I guess I call it reassessment; forcing yourself to take another look at your own beliefs after gathering outside opinions to either validate or refute your initial response.

It basically boils down to this: am I comfortable enough with my own opinions to admittedly enjoy a product that has been widely panned? Will the experts write me off as a no-clue, inexperienced judge of quality? Will I be ostracized from the community of those who love and care and rate?

Mostly this happens in the arts; many might call them guilty pleasures, a term probably invented to make it ok for those like me to enjoy such atrocities in a half-joking, half-serious manner. Let's take music for example. I'll admit it: I enjoy listening to Hall & Oates. I sort-of half think I enjoy the spectacle and egocentric glamour of a Barry Manilow ballad. Most of the garbage pop of the 90s I could still regurgitate word for word. I will proudly and openly admit all of these things.

But still, there's a tint of really? in each of those admissions, and I am free at that point to say, "No, I don't really exercise to Michael McDonald's greatest hits, I just get a kick out of how ridiculous he sounds singing those crappy songs." It's an opt out clause.

Many people, including my much more free-of-society's-chains wife, don't have this dilemma. They like what they like, no apologies. To Kristie, there is no difference between a great song and a song she just loves listening to. Any appreciation, whether it be due to the technical wizardry, the bleeding-heart sincerity or the carefree exuberance, it all goes into the same pot of enjoyment. The same goes for movies. I can come out of a movie and say, "That was an amazing movie, but I didn't really enjoy it." I make the distinction, Kristie says why bother.

Let's bring this phenomenon to the world of beer. At this point, I thought I felt pretty comfortable with my own beer judgment, and was confident that my conclusions about any specific beer wouldn't fall far from the general beer nerd assessment. I know that the beer geeks love meaty stouts, layered with depth, and most enjoy the in-your-face hoppiness of an imperial IPA. I've also come to appreciate lambics and traditional Belgian sour ales, and know that while these are more of a polarizing blend, most beer lovers appreciate them.

Beer, like the arts, has its guilty pleasures as well. In my case, my guilty pleasures call back to my college days, when I was too poor to buy anything decent and spent a lot of nights hammering watery beer after watery beer. I have no problem stating my love for Grain Belt Premium, and if I happen to find myself at an Applebees, I'll probably order a Leinie's Honeyweiss. Do I actually like these beers? See, I thought I was at the point where I could say yes and deal with the consequences.

Then along came Chapeau Winter Gueuze. I've had a few lambics, krieks and sour ales, and have basically enjoyed them all. But this was my first real gueuze. Instantly, I could see the difference between this and the other lambics I've enjoyed. The color was unlike any I'd seen, a dark rust that lacked the fizzy bubble that I remember about the other lambics. The gueuze was nowhere near as tart, though it smelled as if it was. There was a massive sweetness that smothered the acidity; it tasted for a second like the sourness wanted to break through, but it couldn't penetrate the sugar forcefield. I didn't mind it. It reminded me a bit of a cider, with a decent amount of tartness, but more about the sugary sweetness. In fact, Kristie, who tries most of my beers and universally hates them, said this was the best beer she'd ever had. Looking back, that admission should have alarmed me. When I had finished the glass, I declared it a good beer and called it an "entirely pleasant experience."

This being my first gueuze, I just assumed that was how they were supposed to taste: sweet and sugary. How was I to know any better. It was nowhere near my favorite sour beer; I much prefer the unbalanced tartness of the more sour offerings. But I liked the beer none the less.

Then I found this. Uh-oh. Could I possibly like a beer rated in the 12th percentile? Let's look at it in reverse. Is it possible that I don't like a highly-rated beer? Sure, and many times I've confirmed this, though I'm too lazy to cite examples now. So maybe it's ok for me to enjoy this beer, no matter what my beer peers think. I guess spelling it out on a computer screen helps me process the quandary. I am comfortable enough to admit that I enjoyed a beer that almost no one has rated highly? Who cares. I mean, it's just a guilty pleasure, right?

The Beer Cruise: Puerto Rico

2009-02-19T20:22:00.005-06:00

If I sound a little sharp in this entry, it's probably because I just watched my beloved Golden Gopher basketball team again look completely inept against a very average Michigan team. So there's that. And then there's this: I took in the game at Joe Senser's, a Twin Cities sports bar chain that fits a small, but widespread niche: dozens of wall-sized TVs and sporting events, greasy food and mass appeal beer. Not a favorite destination of mine, but it works well for a guys night out to eat.

Here's my beef. We arrived shortly before happy hour ended, and the $2.50 domestic tap special piqued my interest, only because Grain Belt Premium was on the (unpublished) tap list. After some minor inquiries, the waitress informed me that Premo did not fall under the "domestic" category, though it is brewed less than 100 miles away, in New Ulm, MN. Sure, Golden, Colorado is domestic, but classic Minnesota beer? Sorry. I ordered a Sierra Nevada and didn't bother asking whether the California-brewed cerveza counted as domestic. "That's not on special," the waitress made sure I knew. I nodded. "Yeah, I figured you knew that."

I sense a little beer snob oozing out of me. Most of the places I frequent these days offer coast-to-coast draughts, what one might call 'domestic,' and have a handful (if not more) of across the pond imports as well. Maybe it's too much to ask Senser's to change their happy hour wording from 'domestic' to 'garbage' for clarity's sake. I doubt their clientele demands the distinction.

Which leads me to Puerto Rico. If, hypothetically, a beer bar carried a Puerto Rican beer, would that qualify as domestic? I doubt it. I didn't plan on this segue, and it's a pretty rough one, so I'll end all attempts at a smooth transition here.

We arrived in San Juan, Puerto Rico, at about 5 pm of the second night of our cruise. I'd done some very brief research on the number of local beers produced at each of our destinations prior to departure, and wasn't expecting much of any of them. So when the only local beer offered at our first three stops was Medalla Light, I wasn't surprised. Call me crazy, but I gave it slightly higher marks than my peers at RateBeer, calling it "as drinkable, if not more so, than any domestic lite." It's important to note that no matter the integrity of a beer drinker, the circumstances under which a beer is consumed can make a difference. A Medalla Light on a cold February Minneapolis night probably would guarantee a spot on the year-end worst list. A Medalla Light in a courtyard cafe on a beautiful Puerto Rican evening rates a little better. I gave it a star and a half. It's clearly a terrible beer, but it tastes better in 80 degrees.

As we meandered back toward the ship, however, we stumbled upon a local brewery, Old Harbor Brewery. They offered five craft beers; the four staples included a light lager, pilsner, pale ale and stout, and the seasonal "taina" beer was a nut brown. I sampled all five, and when the bartender noticed me jotting down specifics and notes on a napkin, offered to send me home with some literature about the beers and brewery.

The Santo Viejo Pilsner was voted best pilsner of the south at the 2008 United States Beer Tasting Championships, and was quite nice. It was much sweeter than any pilsner I've had, and as one who isn't a huge fan of the typical pilsner hop, I enjoyed the contrast.

The Coqui Golden Lager was obviously their attempt to hit the modest needs of most social beer drinkers and I'm sure would do nicely in that regard.

Their signature beer, the Old Harbor Brew Pale Ale, was my favorite of the five. A delicate beer, one that required focused swigs to pick up the flavors. I do enjoy beers that have in-your-face flavor, but subtlety is almost more impressive when it's pulled off. This beer had a balance of floral fruitiness and mouth-sticking dryness, but didn't knock you over with either. It didn't blow your taste buds away; it required them to work a bit.

The Kolfresi Stout is the highest rated of the four standards on RateBeer, and it's not hard to see why. It has the depth that many serious beer drinkers need, but isn't a test of one's commitment to a task. You can drink a pint of it no problem. It struck me as a pretty standard stout, one you wouldn't necessarily tell stories of to your grandkids, but one I would have no problem drinking consistently.

The seasonal beer had been available for about a week when we visited, and is still unrated on RateBeer...I could be the first, which would be fun. I like nut browns, especially because they aren't easy to find. Yes, there's Newcastle, but the style does not have a lot of mass popularity. Maybe we'll see a boom in them in the next couple years, as craft breweries seem to latch on to the styles that are going unproduced at a particular moment in time. What I especially loved about this one was its smoothness. This was a beer that I think even the most casual beer drinkers could guzzle, because it doesn't overwhelm you with unfamiliar pop and it doesn't kill you on the back end. It isn't as complex as the meatiest brews, but if I wasn't in the mood for a hop bomb or a juicy stout, I think a few creamy nut browns would suffice.

It was a pleasant way to spend an hour in San Juan, and though I'll probably never return, I won't soon forget the experience of trying the best of what Puerto Rico had to offer.

The Beer Cruise: Part 1

2009-02-17T18:27:00.008-06:00

I wouldn't necessarily call a cruise the best way to vacation, but after three uninterrupted months of Minnesota winter and a taxing day-to-day job grind, a cruise worked quite nicely. No, it's not exactly the way I like to travel--off the beaten path, eating street food and finding the non-touristy parts of touristy cities. You do get a bit funnelled in to a daily routine and programmed, pre-determined activities and specific, mass appeal cultural scenery. The drinks are a bit spendy, and far from stiff. The entertainment is, well...who am I to judge.

But a cruise is nothing if not relaxing. If you don't mind mingling with 50-somethings (and above--sometimes way way above), aren't too snobby to find enjoyment in an off-key, bad haircutted lounge singer, and can fend for yourself for a few hours in a dirty Caribbean port town, you might enjoy one. And you might be pleasantly surprised in the number of obscure beers you might get to try.

Counting the Minneapolis and Detroit airports, and including the four beers I nabbed during our one day in Fort Lauderdale, I chugged an astounding 22 new beers on this 8.5 day trek. Of course, once we left the continental United States, rarely were any better than average, but the cultural context in which the tastings took place evened up the score a bit.

So, sprinkled between the poolside pina coladas and the five-course dinner Italian wines were these islandy brews. I'll try my best to elaborate on tasting notes (many of which are still scribbled on food- and beer-stained napkins) with some general comments about that day's cruising events.

It must be noted that my trusty beer rating pen exploded on the plane prior to embarkment, and I was forced to use the crappy Costa Cruises pen for my reviews. Thus, many of my notes are brief, and frankly, after you've had a few Caribbean beers, there's not much more that can be said.

Day 1: Embarkment from Fort Lauderdale. The beer: Franziskaner Hefe-Weissbier. We boarded the ship at about 12:30, but couldn't check into our rooms until later that afternoon. What better to do, at that point, then check out the bar? Rhetorical. This would be my first chance to see the beer offerings on the ship. Not surprisingly, they were pretty limited. Mostly Buds and Coors, with a token beer from a few European countries that figured to be represented among the cruise's guests. This was a Costa cruise, an Italian ship that attracts many foreign-language speaking folk because of its multi-lingual entertainment and relaxed smoking policy. Maybe I was the only one who noted the latter, but to a no-smoking-anywhere-in-my-state Minnesotan, it was evident.

I'd had the Italian offering (Peroni--I was hoping for more), wasn't in the mood for something I knew I'd loathe (Beck's and Carlsberg), and didn't want to dive right into the unknown (Kotayk--we'll get to that later), so I took a stab at the weissbier. Without question, this was the best beer I had on the ship all week. I don't love wheat beers, and I have a hard time imagining one that would clearly outshine the rest, but there was no doubting the validity of the Franziskaner. It isn't weissbier weather in Minnesota, but when it's 80 degrees and sunny a wheat beer will do nicely. Let's put it this way: I'd choose a hefe-weissen over anything I've ever been offered in a slowpitch softball parking lot or on a lazy pontoon boat ride. The drinkability is usually high. As in, way higher than the self-proclaimed drinkable Budweiser.

Franziskaner is no different, and I particularly enjoy wheat beers that offer more spice than fruit, the anti-Blue Moon, if you will. This beer had good spice on the nose and lips and snaked down without skunky incident. (If my verbage has broadened, it may be due to the Hopslam I just guzzled.) Did this beer make me delve deep into my beer flavor vocabulary? Not really. Did it convert me to a full-time wheat beer guy? Definitely not. Was it worth the $5...plus 15% gratuity...plus 20% port tax? Because it meant I would be on a cruise for the next seven days, yes. It did, and it was. A solid 3.5 star beer.

January Stats

2009-02-02T21:46:00.003-06:00

One month and 34 new beers down. I thought I'd have a harder time finding new beers now that I've knocked off many basics available in the Twin Cities, but new (to me) and seasonal ones keep popping up across the cities. It's easy to ignore a brewery for even a whole year, such as I did last year with Pennsylvania's Victory and am trying my best to do with Wisconsin's Capital. So, even if I'm not excited by what I haven't tried, it's still easy to find new beers. The amount of beers out there astounds me, and the options aren't shrinking. They're, like every other commodity in this country, growing exponentially. I have no doubt that it would be relatively easy to keep a 250-300 new beers a year pace up for a lifetime.

So, without reviewing any new beers in depth, I'll recap some of the highs and lows of my January, and spew out some nuggets for numbers junkies like myself.

Of the 34 new beers:

12 were imports, with Belgium leading the way with five new selections. My Unibroue sampler pack contributed two for Canada, but I'm trying to stretch that pack out over a couple months. One apiece for Australia, Western Europe, Germany, South America and the United Kingdom.

22 domestics: five from Colorado, four each from Wisconsin, Minnesota and California, three from Pennsylvania, and the rest scattered about. No need to get into specifics yet.

Out of five stars, my average beer rating for January beers was 3.13 stars. It must be noted that I had most of the mega-brewery crap last year, and those beers skewed my 2008 average of 2.79 a bit. Thus, an improved 2009 average was expected. Don't fret, I still kept room for a plethora of skunky garbage.

Some of us stat-masters would suggest that median, not average, is a more accurate stat indicator. Fifth-grade math lesson: median represents the middle number of a sequence, thus eliminating potential bottom- or top-heavy average skewers. My median rating for January was a 3.5, which suggests I had more above average beers than I did below average.

My most common rating of the 34 given out was, in fact, four stars, which I gave out ten times. More than a third of the beers I first tried this month I deemed outstanding, which bodes well for the future. We're getting to the point where I've tried most of the cheap stuff, and I'll have to spend a little more coin to get at the untasted. That, I would assume, can only mean I'm having better, more complex beer.

On to some monthly awards. The best beer I had this month: Struiselensis, a Belgian sour beer. I've decided that I love sour beers, lambics and the like. I guess I've always craved for taste-bud-challenging flavors, spicy or sour, and these beers fit the bill. This one has unapologetic tartness up front, like the sourest candy you could find. However, after the initial shock, it became as drinkable as any smooth summer beer. I love the clean flavors, the crisp bite and the lingering sourness. Plus, my wife enjoys them, which is far more than can be said for any other beer variety.

Worst beer of the month: Blue Diamond Lager. Scroll down to read of its unpleasantness.

Pleasant surprise of the month: Samuel Adams Imperial Pilsner. It's almost unfair to classify this as a pilsner, the hop intensity is so far out of control. I generally don't like pilsners, but I guess when you double the hop content, you thereby double my enjoyment.

Biggest disappointment: most of the winter seasonals I tried. Here's a quick list of those that didn't deliver, with some comments from my initial tastings. It must be noted that I fully expected the Leinenkugel's offering to be awful.

Leinenkugel's 1888 Bock. "Utterly horrible. Took my best effort to finish it."

Capital Brewery Winter Skal. "After four strong beers, this one fell way short." Not really even sure what that means anymore. I'm sure it sounded like a clear criticism at the time.

Schell's Snowstorm. "Tastes like every part of the process involved burning and over-cooking." The best beer on this list, just not a flavor I enjoy. It's become quite clear that I have no appreciation for Viennas.

Redhook Winter Hook. "Not very strong, lacking flavor, and a little too nutty." Sometimes you run out of things to say. A phenomenon you'd quickly realize if you frequented beer rating websites. It's kind of like Kate Winslett/Leo DiCaprio red carpet interview questions. Wait, haven't you been following E!'s red carpet coverage like I have? An indictment of marriage.

The Worst Beer of All Time?

2009-01-27T19:05:00.005-06:00

It's a bit early in the year, you might say, for me to put a Schlage lock on 2009's worst beer, but I say no. In fact, I'm not stopping there. Blue Diamond Lager, supposedly brewed by Cold Spring Brewery in Cold Spring, MN, very well could be the worst beer ever produced.

I'll lay out the argument in a bit, but first, let's explore some opinions on the subject. I'm eliminating malt beverages, or 40s, because they simply cannot be included in any sane conversation about skunky beers. They are intended to be cheap and skunky, and their sole purpose is to get homeless people and college idiots drunk as quickly and inexpensively as possible. I know this because not long ago I was a college student who occasionally participated in such desperate acts. Anyway.

So, the masses have their word. A quick google search for "worst beer of all time" produces quite hefty results. A July, 2008, list on Rockthelist.com gives the nod to something called Billy Beer. After reading that link, I'll be visiting ebay upon finishing this entry.

Quick side note: many results of this search lead to message boards and forums regarding the worst beers of all time. I'm skipping them, settling only for firm lists probably written by bored college stoners posing as legitimate internet writers.

Second quick side note: it appears almost all of the results are message board and forum collections. Slightly disappointed none of the mainstream top-ten-list-heavy publications haven't picked this topic up.

If I remember correctly, Busch Non-Alcoholic held the edge at ratebeer.com, but that portion of the website isn't functioning right now, so I guess you'll have to take my word on that. Other common message board suggestions seem to always point back to Wisconsin--a version of Milwaukee's Best, a Miller product, something from LaCrosse, and I generally agree. I still remember a 30-pack of Milwaukee's Best Special Reserve Ice we saved for months in our college house specifically to give to underage kids we didn't like, and who didn't know any better, at our parties.

But I'm telling you, Blue Diamond Lager pummels them all.

How bad is this beer? Records of its existence are almost impossible to locate. It does not have a page at either ratebeer.com or beeradvocate.com, and is unrecognized by Cold Spring Brewery's website. A google search for Blue Diamond Lager returns almost nothing promising. But I promise you, it exists, and there are currently 9 unopened cans from a $4.99 12-pack resting lukewarm in a melted-ice cooler in Chaska, MN.

I knew this had to be the worst beer of all time because it lasted months in my college house (which held five beer-thirsty, uber-poor men) for months and outlasted beer pong parties, tailgating festivities and late-night paper inspiration binges.

I know this is the worst beer of all time because, though I know it will go unconsumed, it is a must purchase whenever I spot it in a liquor store. This past weekend in Winona was the first I'd seen it since those fateful college days more than three years ago.

I know this is the worst beer of all time because it serves as punishment for drinking games. It can be used as a test of one's manliness and pain threshold. Its taste cannot be likened to anything, because there is no other edible product on this planet that tastes as bad.

I know this is the worst beer of all time because the only place I could find a picture of it was on a website dedicated to obscure beer can collecting, just below Blitz Light and the generic Beer.

And I know this is the worst beer of all time simply because the sensation that overwhelms your senses upon tasting is something that cannot be described, nor can it be compared to any other tasting you'll ever endure. I wish I could put this more eloquently, but the simplicity of this statement should radiate with clarity: Blue Diamond Lager is the worst beer I've ever, and will ever have.

January Snackers: Domestics

2009-01-23T17:52:00.003-06:00

I wasn't sure I could make it, but I went four consecutive days without having a beer. Let's just say I'm rewarding myself tonight. In the meantime, here's a brief recap of some of the best domestics I've had this year.

Victory Prima Pils

Victory
Downington, Pennsylvania
5.3% ABV
3.5 stars

I guess I was too busy hammering Bell's and Surly last year to really get into Victory, but the third of their offerings I've had this year (and I'm probably tackling Old Horizontal and Storm King later tonight) was probably the best pilsner I've ever had. Apologies, of course, to Pilsner Urquell, but the flavors were unbelievably clean in the Victory, which I had on tap at Bryant Lake Bowl. Nice and grassy, with a large dollop of bitter hops. Pilsner definitely isn't one of my favorite styles of beer, but I liked this quite a bit. It's easy to see why Prima Pils ranks among the top ten pilsners at RateBeer.

Avery Old Jubilation Ale

Avery
Boulder, Colorado
8% ABV
4 stars

Via friend recommendation. Lovely winter scene on the label, for starters. This beer had a terrific round flavor--you could taste layers from the time it hit your tongue til the moment it splashed your stomach. Chewy, thick, but with a nice spicy hop kick. A beer that has a bunch of alcohol, but is disguised quite well. Plus, the Gophers were en route to a shocking overtime victory at Wisconsin at the time of consumption, so it gets an extra boost there.

Great Divide Hibernation Ale

Great Divide
Denver, Colorado
8.1% ABV
4 stars

Strong. This flavor would survive a simple rinse of the glass, I think. It's dense and rich; very malty. Not a lot of bite in it, but it's meaty enough to take up an hour of your time and not feel laborious. Would serve well as a nightcap, as it has that pleasant warming feel that we all enjoy around midnight.

Samuel Adams Imperial Pilsner

Boston Beer Company
Boston, Massachusetts
8.8% ABV
4 stars

So, if Prima Pils was the best pilsner I've sampled, how does this one get an extra half star? Check the alcohol content amigo. This is massive. I'd never even heard of an imperial pilsner when I saw this on the shelf, and I was skeptical upon purchase. Remember, I'm not a huge pilsner guy to begin with. I guess you can add me to the imperial pilsner facebook group, though, because this baby satisfied me to no end. It reminded me in flavor a lot of Surly's Bitter Brewer, heavy on the citrus, but about five times as strong. Had a buttery texture but somehow was still quite crisp. I loved the extreme bitterness up front, and fear that this could be a dangerous beer to drink in mass quantities. Good thing it's sold in four-packs, because six of these would equal one large morning headache.

January Snackers: Global Edition

2009-01-21T13:35:00.007-06:00

I've decided to go on a mini body cleanse, something I convince myself to try every few months, and am trying to stay away from beer and other chemicals this week. These breaks usually happen right before I know my body will be taking a toll; in this case, it's a throwback kegger with the boys on Saturday, followed by a massive Super Bowl bash the next Sunday. Not long after, I'll be aboard a Caribbean cruise ship for a week. It's not exactly the healthiest of schedules. This week, and potentially the weeks in between events, will be dedicated to purging and cleansing.

Luckily, I reserve the other 48 weeks of the year for complete body negligence, and have a decent reservoir of early '09 reviews I can tap into. I'll hit a few today (you can call them something more catchy than January Snackers if you'd like) and save a few for later. Since I'm only doing mini reviews, I'll link the beers to their corresponding RateBeer.com pages if you'd like more information or opinion.

Verhaeghe Duchesse de Bourgogne

Verhaeghe
Vichte, West-Vlaanderen, Belgium
6.2% ABV
4 stars

A Belgian sour ale, a traditional Flemish red ale--call it what you want, but this one's spunky. I'm beginning to think that I can not just tolerate, but love this wild yeast stuff. I sampled this one at The Bulldog Lowertown in St. Paul, which is an expansive, fresh spot to get some good beer. Not the longest list of beers in town, but it's roomy, and the option of getting a flight of beers is nice. The waitress couldn't tell us the order of the flight, but an astute nose could figure it out. If you don't think you have one of those, ask the bartender. Staff's beer knowledge is a bit lacking.

Anyway, the beer had the vinegar sourness, but was sneaky sweet. One person in the group described it as a liquid sweet tart. I wouldn't go that far--if you dove into a glass of this with on the condition that it tasted like candy, you'd be in trouble. Unless you coat your candy in vinegar I guess. A good beer nonetheless.

Coniston Bluebird Bitter

Coniston
Coniston, England
3.6% ABV
3.5 stars

Part of the same sampler as the sour, this English bitter obviously didn't pack the same potency, but subtlety can be a huge strength in a beer. This one smelled of honey and sweet rum, and the honey was a huge component of the taste. Very nice thin texture. If you're looking for an approachable bitter, and one that you could drink a few pints of, this could be the one. The subtle sweetness balanced out the bitter component, and for a low-content beer (3.6%), the flavor was outstanding. Make sure you get the cask version, though, it looks from the reviews like the bottle doesn't go down quite as well.

Unibroue Blanche de Chambly

Unibroue
Chambly, Canada
5% ABV
3.5 stars

Unibroue sampler packs are beginning to pop up all over the place recently, and I received one as a Christmas gift from a co-worker (love co-workers who do their homework). It's not exactly the best time to dive into a Belgian White, but it's a beer-drinker's responsibility to be able to assess a beer objectively despite the circumstances.

Big froth on this one. I know it's called head, and I could use a finger measurement, but this really did remind me of cappuccino froth. Classic spicy witbier smell. I enjoyed the color spectrum especially on this one, from a dusty lemon peel to cloudy melon. Drinking this beer in the proper glass allows you to fully appreciate the multiple senses a beer can tickle.

There was definitely more fruit than spice as far as taste goes, and if you're not a fan of wheat beers, well, you know to stay away. But on the right day (maybe a Saturday), and in the right place (maybe on a boat) this beer could be perfect.

Eisenbahn Defumada

Cervejeria Sudbrack
Blumenau, Brazil
6.5%
2.5 stars

My first Brazilian beer, and one of the few smoked beers I've had. Right off the bat, I'll tell you that it's no Surly Smoke, nor is it close. But it's not bad. The smell was strangely sweet to me; I couldn't stop thinking about tangy barbeque sauce. Sweetness came through in the taste, with some caramel as well. It was good for a few sips, but I labored to get the whole bottle down. Eisenbahn is beginning to show up in Minnesota (I bought this one in South Dakota of all places) so maybe I'll give it another try.

Samichlaus Bier

2009-01-17T21:26:00.007-06:00

Brewery: Brewery Castle Eggenberg, Eggenberg, Austria

Style: Doppelbock

ABV: 14%

Rating: 4 stars

No misprint: 14% alcohol. The self-proclaimed 'world's most extraordinary beer' hit shelves again late in 2008 as the world's highest-content lager. So, how do they achieve this insane content level? Well, the beer is brewed once a year on December 6, then fermented slowly over the next ten months. There is a more complicated and technical beer-speak explanation, but just imagine what would happen to any food you kept in the fridge for ten months. You can imagine the strong character it might develop.

Samichlaus is the perfect example that a beer's color has no direct correlation to its strength. You could put this beer next to a Killian's Irish Red and I'd bet it would be difficult to tell the difference. It's a light-deflecting red--remember, it is a lager, not an imperial stout.

I was pleasantly delighted at the aroma. My first sniff yielded a potent alcohol kick, but when I dipped down again, I found many subtle touches. I swear I smelled Greek olives or some kind of vinaigrette, but I could have just been hungry. There was definitely some sparkling white grape, though, and the intense sweetness had some acidic balance to it. Certainly I caught a whiff of caramel.

The taste was pure sweetness, though it took a few minutes to settle in. It's unfair to take one sip and make any proclamations, and this one had me reeling off the bat. Like the aroma, the alcohol kick was substantial--maybe not in the mouth, but going down the throat. It burned like the hard stuff does, and for a second I thought I might need a beer chaser. No matter, I pressed on.

The taste, as I found, improved as the glass emptied. As a skeptic, I must entertain the idea that this was because my level of intoxication was jumping dramatically each time I took a swallow. Did that have something to do with my increasing enjoyment? Maybe, but who cares. If a beer can get me buzzed enough during the course of 11 ounces that I change my opinion of it, doesn't that by definition make it an outstanding beer?

It, for the second half of the glass, tasted like I was drinking liquid caramel. Not the first taste I look for in a beer, but by no means was it unpleasant. You might think that a 14% beer would be borderline undrinkable (think of all the terrible high-content malt beverages out there), but the long fermentation process presumably gives this beer its smoothness. It does have a lingering taste in the mouth that isn't the most friendly, but it makes up for that with a nice warming burn that is welcomed on a winter's day. And the alcohol content was disguised quite well; I've had 8% beers that did worse.

Without question, this was a terrific experience for me. It will go on my mental mantle of beerdom next to the other classics and strange beers I've tried. Not the best beer I've had and not close, but was it the most extraordinary?

No, I guess not.

But I still liked it.

Tyranena: Rocky's Revenge and Devil Over a Barrel

2009-01-13T17:43:00.003-06:00

Tyranena made a pretty big splash this fall in Minnesota, and it's continuing into 2009 for me. I loved their IPAs they released in the warmer months, but waited until the bitter cold (-17 today in Minneapolis) to sample the heartier stuff. Last night I destroyed the Devil Over a Barrel, an Imperial Oatmeal Porter with Coffee Beans, and tonight I'm tackling Rocky's Revenge, a Brown Ale.

I'll start with the Barrel. Couldn't find a picture of it, but it's part of the 'Brewers Gone Wild!' series that has produced a number of bud-challenging offerings. Barrel is no different. As soon as I dislodged the cap, I was transported to school mornings growing up, when I'd wander sleepily into a coffee-stained kitchen. The coffee smell was beyond potent.

As a non-coffee drinker (the childhood kitchen scarred me), I was concerned. How could I possibly enjoy a beer that tasted so strongly of beanage. The first few sips were challenging, but by the halfway point, I could barely put the glass down. I guess I'll attribute that to the oatmeal aspect of the beer. I can't quite explain it, but it's as if the oatmeal was a smooth bridge from the tip-of-the-lips coffee taste to the spicy throat tickle. That middle portion of the drink was so smooth, it didn't matter what the front end tasted like.

It's good to have an outstanding porter. Imperial porters are especially difficult to find. I feel like porters would be an easy transition for people who enjoy beers like Michelob Amber Bock or fake darks of that nature. They are smooth, potent, and packed with flavor. I wouldn't necessarily recommend this one as a starting point, but once you have an appreciation for the style, Devil Over a Barrel is a must.

As for Rocky's Revenge. This beer is a year-round Tyranena option, and fairly priced. It's tabbed as a brown ale, with 'a portion aged in bourbon barrels.' I don't have many brown ales, and they too aren't very prominent these days (four versions of Surly's Bender are currently among RateBeer.com's 25 highest-rated brown ales). Newcastle is a common brown ale that comes to mind.

Well Rocky's Revenge is a good one. I didn't get much of a sniff on this one, and it took me a few sips to get a handle on what I enjoyed about it. There's definitely bourbon in there, but nothing overpowering. I really grasped onto a wonderful sweetness that was present in every gulp, a nice vanilla cream that you can't help but like.

There's no comparison between the two beers when it comes to potency, and Barrel is clearly a more complex, rich beer, but Rocky is an easy drink and one I'd offer to any average beer drinker. I pounded it in a half hour, and that was while I was typing this. It's a good gateway, as they say, to get to know unfamiliar kinds of beers. As far as ratings go, I'd give Devil Over a Barrel 4.5 stars and Rocky's Revenge 4.

Rochefort Trappistes 8

2009-01-10T09:39:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Brasserie de Rochefort (Abbaye de Notre-Dame de Saint-Remy), Rochefort, Belgium

Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale

ABV: 9.2%

Rating: 4.5 stars

What happens when you have this beer that in your mind you've always considered your favorite beer of all time. You keep this beer in your back pocket, not drinking one for a couple years while you develop some beer tasting and rating chops. You buy it in mid-December, pencil it in as your New Year's Eve nightcap, ideally topping off the best beer-drinking year of your life with the best beer of your life. Except do you really want to have your favorite beer--and rate it for the first time--when the ball drops to midnight, after you've had multiple drinks and clouded your overall (not to mention beer-rating) judgment? I guess not.

So my long-labeled favorite beer of all time sat in my fridge for a month, until last night.

But what happens when your favorite beer of all time is no longer your favorite beer of all time? It is sort of a mindset-altering experience. Even though when I was asked the all-time question, I would always preface Rochefort 8 by saying 'I'm not quite sure it still is, but I've always considered it to be...' And maybe that's why I didn't rate on in 2008. I didn't want to know. Didn't want to have to potentially change my mental rankings.

There's a very easy parallel to be drawn between this reluctance and my reluctance to knock clearly inferior, but sentimentally meaningful songs off my all time favorite songs list. Sure, maybe with my keener ear and more mature understanding of music a Get Up Kids emo-ballad doesn't stand up to a TV On the Radio psych-out. Maybe a Grain Belt Premium doesn't have the full-bodied flavor of a Bell's Third Coast Old Ale. But maybe that doesn't matter. Maybe sentimentality still has a place in ratings, and the power of pleasant memories should be included in the final tally.

Maybe I can still convince myself that Rochefort Trappistes 8 is my favorite beer of all time.

But no, I can't. There are too many good beers out there that just plain taste better to justify putting this one at top simply for poetic reasons.

I almost feel like I can't really even rate the beer at this point. I'll try. The first signal I received last night that maybe this wasn't the beer I remembered was its color. It pours a muddy, murky mahogany, so hazy that no light in my house could puncture it. This color of beer usually does not bode well for my taste buds.

It smells quite strong, and smells more like adjectives than it does actual identifiable scents: warm, deep, dark. There are definitely some dark fruits in there; figs, cherries, but mostly it smells like it looks. A bit daunting.

The fruits come through in the taste, and I can picture a friend of mine sensing a bit of cough syrup in this one. It is highly carbonated, which is a nice way to balance the bold flavor and high alcohol content. If you feel like you're drinking something sparkling, it really can't be that strong, can it? Mixed reviews about the prominence of alcohol, but if I can't taste it outright, I definitely know it's there.

The most pleasant characteristic about this beer is the wonderful burn it leaves. It's warming like a cognac, setting your mouth, esophagus and stomach ablaze. A nice second taste in every swallow. After a bottle of this, I wouldn't say you feel refreshed, but you do feel satisfied.

Maybe it isn't my favorite beer of all time, that potentially dubious honor now falling to Orval. But this is still a really good beer, and a must-try for anyone looking to broaden their beer palate. And perhaps I'll try another one in a couple years, forget about its old sentimental value, and leapfrog it back to the top.

Victory Battle: HopDevil vs. Hop Wallop

2009-01-07T17:44:00.013-06:00

HopDevil

vs.
Hop Wallop

Two of my first beers of 2009 happened to be two hopped-up offerings from Downington, Pennsylvania's Victory Brewing Company. I decided to pit the two against each other without prejudging them based on any of the beer ratings websites. I'll attack the competition from the various components of beer rating, and in the interest of space I'll refer to them as 'Devil' and 'Wallop.' The 'Hop' seems a bit redundant.

Appearance: Devil comes out quite cloudy, darker than orange but not quite to the candy cherry level. Let's call it light ruby. I tend to use ruby as a beer color quite a bit. Wallop is much more golden, while still cloudy. The color spectrum runs from pure gold at the bottom to a sort of amberish-melon at the top. Wallop definitely has the larger head of the two, but neither stick around for long. Edge: Wallop.

Smell: Devil reeks of floral hops, as you can imagine. It's much the same as many IPAs out there, and although I don't want to bulk them all together, this isn't an aroma I haven't smelled before. Wallop gives me a little more complexity. Yes, those monster hops are instantly present, but there's a sweet side to this one, maybe honey, that I didn't detect in the Devil. With that said, if my nose could subconsciously gravitate toward one smell, I bet it'd pick over-the-top hops. Edge: Devil.

Taste: Well. I must say off the bat that neither of these would rank among my top ten hopfuls, and that is disappointing. Devil's flavor actually made me raise my eyebrows a bit. It was, without exaggeration, like eating a fresh hop right off the plant. I didn't get any citrus, no sweetness, and not much depth. A potent kick to the taste buds. Wallop wasn't as blatant, and had much better balance. It's crispier and brighter at the start, but slows down to a smooth butter. And the hops are bold enough. Plus, there's a bit more alcohol in this one. Edge: Wallop.

Mouthfeel: I like Devil here. It has a huge pine finish and leaves the palate quite dry, which I love. Wallop is dry as well, but it's much more smooth going down than it is clingy. Edge: Devil.

Drinkability: As I said earlier, you won't find either of these on my best of '09 list (already thinking about it). Therefore, I wouldn't seek either out at my local beer store in favor of a different staple. Wallop is a seasonal, but Devil is available all year. They're both drinkable. They're both decent. I guess I just like Wallop a bit more. Edge: Wallop.

Final tally: Hop Wallop 3, HopDevil 2. It's really not that close for me. The difference in taste is enough to sway the whole argument.

Beers of the Year: 1. Orval

2008-12-31T15:30:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Brasserie dOrval

Style: Belgian Ale

ABV: 6.2%

Rating: 5 stars

A complete sensory experience. The color of this beer suggests something completely different from the actual taste. It's very golden, not unlike your average mega-beer, but with a much stronger head. But the smells that emanate from that golden liquid are simply heavenly.

I got a huge crisp apple cider whiff on my first smell, and there's definitely a large fruit presence to go with some subtle hops. It smells delicious and interesting, and if it's possible for a beer to smell refreshing, this one does.

The first shocker in the taste is how dry this beer is. It's almost like drinking a dry champagne. Heavy fruit flavor, but with the sparkling cling of champagne. Really easy to swish around your mouth and swallow, and seeing that I prefer dryness to sweetness, it fit my needs perfectly.

This beer has it all, down even to its presentation. Its uniquely-shaped bottle is appealing, and if served correctly in an Orval tulip glass, it's a can't miss. Orval will quench and refresh you, give you enough alcohol presence at the back to satisfy those needs, and won't bog you down or take you two hours to finish. You probably will want to make it last that long, though.

Beers of the Year: 2. Bell's Hopslam

2008-12-30T13:23:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Bell's, Kalamazoo, Michigan

Style: Double India Pale Ale

ABV: 10%

Rating: 5 Stars

My original review:

This is a beer I had been coveting since summer, having started my beer journey after its availability ended. I thought I would have to wait until next January to try it, as it's only available for a month and a half at the beginning of the year. However, I was delighted to see it on the bottle list at the Blue Nile, an Ethiopian restaurant in Minneapolis. Why was this beer so sought after? For one, Bell's is one of the best breweries in the country, and its wide availability in Minnesota has allowed me to sample many of their outstanding options. Secondly, Imperial IPAs are without question my favorite style of beer to date. You get the intense hop taste on the front, with the monster alcohol kick at the back. You can usually sip them, enjoy the taste, and feel it at the end. True, a Hopslam is gonna set you back $7 or so, as most DIPAs will, but you get the equivalent of two beers in one tasty snifter.

So, did Hopslam deliver?

The color of the beer is the first key. This one was that beautiful deep amber--darker than the bug in the rock amber--sort of like a harvest moon color. That's a good sign. It's a color that just looks enticing.

The aroma was phenomenal. Yes, there were the immediate hops that one would expect from a beer of this variety, and yes, there were citrusy notes that again, are expected. But there was a sweetness there as well. The beer is brewed with honey, and being able to find that scent in a powerful beer says a lot about the brewing. It smelled balanced.

The taste. I'll refrain from going into any flowershop or produce aisle metaphors here, but my first contact with Hopslam was as good as any I've had. Again, the honey is crucial, as it balances out the roof-of-the-mouth dryness that comes with these bitter hops. It sticks to the inside of your mouth, but is wiped away by the sweet honey. Magical.

Without question, Bell's Hopslam was one of the three or four best beers I've had. I look forward to buying it in bulk come January 2009.

Beers of the Year: 3. Surly Furious

2008-12-29T16:39:00.002-06:00

Brewery: Surly, Brooklyn Center, Minnesota

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 6%

Rating: 5 stars

Hard to knock anything about this beer. This one really put Surly on the map a couple years back, when it was hard to find. Now that it's available at most decent liquor stores and on tap in many bars, I feel like sometimes I take for granted just how good it is.

The color, for one, is unsurpassed. A delicious deep amber; close to red but with that rusty orange shine that almost certainly means good things are to come. Really nice head, and one that clings and stays as the glass empties. And of course, it has that Surly dry-hopped smell.

The brewers say that the key to this beer is the Golden Promise malt, a delicately cared-for barley from Scotland that gives this beer such intense hops. I guess I can't disagree there. The hops come from somewhere anyway.

Furious has the perfect blend of bright citrus burst, dry sticky mouthfeel and bitter pine swallow. There isn't any residual spoon left behind here. It's smooth. This in fact may be my favorite beer, but its availability taints its brilliance just slightly. For the price, though, it can't be beat. If I was dropped in a store with all the beer in the world and told I could spend my last $10 on any one six-pack (or four-pack in this case), I would immediately go for Surly Furious.

Beers of the Year: 4. Goose Island Imperial IPA

2008-12-28T12:41:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Goose Island, Chicago, Illinois

Style: Imperial IPA

ABV: 9.2%

Rating: 5 stars

Whoa. You want an explosion of flavorful hops, this is your beer. Three kinds of hops: Tettnang, Simcoe and Cascade give this beer power and potency in every swallow. I wouldn't recommend this beer for a Bud-lover, but if you think you like hoppiness, this beer will either confirm or overturn your feelings.

The hops are there up front, but where this beer stands out is after it slides down your throat. There is no residual metallic taste that can sometime rear its ugly head at a beer's finish. It goes down smoothly, piney and sharp, and maintains a balance throughout each and every sip. This beer is an accomplishment.

Beers of the Year: 5. Delirium Tremens

2008-12-28T12:37:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Browerij Huyghe, Melle, Belgium

Style: Belgian Strong Ale

ABV: 8.5%

Rating: 5 stars

One of the few beers on this list I'd had prior to 2008. This was the first really good, highly respected beer I ever had, and perhaps its sentimental worth makes me overvalue it a bit. Even so, it's a delicious beer.

It is outstanding on tap, better than it is in a bottle for sure. This beer is very complex, and I dare anyone to try to identify all of the fruity, sweet components. I'd have a hard time denying any detected flavor by another taster. I lean most toward an apricot flavor, with some subtle banana toward the end of the slurp. It's creamy but not sticky. Strong but not overbearing. Well-balanced but pungent. Overrated or not, this one's a keeper.

Beers of the Year: 6. Southern Tier Choklat

2008-12-28T12:34:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Southern Tier, Lakewood, New York

Style: Imperial Stout

ABV: 11%

Rating: 5 stars

One of the first beers I rated this year, and it set a standard that wasn't easy to match. We must remember, when I started this project, I'd had some great beers, but I wasn't paying attention to the innovation going on. This beer clued me in.

My original synopsis from February 23: "Amazing. Smells, looks and tastes like a thick chocolate milk. With a kick, of course. Unrivaled chocolate flavor. I don't even love chocolate, but I love this beer."

It's true; I don't like chocolate all that much. I don't have a sweet tooth. But an 11% chocolate beer is hard not to appreciate. Southern Tier is the most creative brewery I sampled this year and most of the time their risks pay off. I would recommend this beer even to non-beer drinkers. It may take you an hour and a half to drink, but you'll be feeling great afterward.

Beers of the Year: 7. Tyranena Scurvy IPA

2008-12-25T12:18:00.004-06:00

Brewery: Tyranena, Lake Mills, Wisconsin

Style: India Pale Ale

ABV: 6.5%

Rating: 4.5 stars

Tyranena made a strong second-half push to be in the running for Brewery of the Year, and this beer was the flagship. It has all the best characteristics of a juicy IPA--hops up front, bitter pines in the back, but the separation is in the middle. Scurvy IPA is loaded with orange flavor, thanks to the orange peels introduced in the brewing process.

I'm usually not too hard to please when it comes to IPAs, so this ranking reflects that in a way, but Tyranena deserved to be rewarded for the half-dozen excellent brews they put out this year. The Scurvy was part of their Brewers Gone Wild! series, one that produced some of the most potent beers of the season. No surprise, the IPA was my favorite.

It has since disappeared from shelves, so get your hands on this one if you see it. Otherwise, wait 'til next summer and buy a four-pack of this, and every other Brewers Gone Wild! offering.

Beers of the Year: 8. North Coast Old Rasputin Russian Imperial Stout

2008-12-24T16:05:00.006-06:00

Brewery: North Coast, Fort Bragg, California

Style: Russian Imperial Stout

ABV: 9%

Rating: 4.5 stars

This is definitely the age of the Russian Imperial Stout. Check any beer review website or ask your local craft beer store clerk which beers are hot. Stouts are the rage. Maybe it's because beer people were tired of being upstaged and outclassed by wine snobs, and they wanted to showcase beers that can be consumed like wine, sip by sip over the course of an evening. Stouts are the ticket to that ride, and Old Rasputin does the job as well as any.

I liked quite a few of these imperials this year, including Bell's Expedition Stout, Surly Darkness and many of the specialty stouts put out by Southern Tier and other breweries. I chose Ol Raspy because it was one of the first I had, and the aforementioned breweries each have a beer (or more) I had rated higher. By default almost, but taking nothing away from this outstanding brew, North Coast finds its way into the top ten.

As I alluded to earlier before veering off, these dense, hearty beers are meant to be enjoyed gradually. If a Miller Lite drinker attacked this beer with the same vigor as they would a homecoming kegger, the results would be disappointing. Each sip has many stages and should be enjoyed on the nose, lips, tongue, roof of the mouth and throat. I especially enjoy the buttery coating left in the crevices of your mouth.

This beer is--buzzword alert!--smooth, it's rich, and above all, it's tasty. It can stand alone and doesn't need to be used to rinse your mouth after a big swallow of food. The taste evolves as the beer warms. The sharp sting down the throat is most evident when cold, but the sweet gooeyness is best enjoyed warm.

If you want to sit down, engage in conversation with friends, and delight in a warm, comforting drink as you go, pick up a bottle of this. It's not too scary for the average beer drinker, but it's still rewarding for the most particular connoisseur.

Beers of the Year: 9. Cantillon Kriek 100% Lambic

2008-12-24T11:45:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Brasserie Cantillon, Brussels, Belgium

Style: Lambic

ABV: 5%

Rating: 4.5 stars

I'll post my original review of the beer. Nothing has changed.

After enjoying the Flat Earth wild ale, I knew I had to take the plunge and try a real Belgian lambic. Cantillon has brewed this beer the same way, in the same barrels, for over 100 years, and is a well-known name. I figured it was a good one to start with, though at $10.99, it was the most expensive 11 ounces I've purchased yet.

Again, this is a fruit beer, and one that is fermented with live bacteria instead of the more sanitary yeast. Kriek is cherry-flavored, but not like cherry Jolly Ranchers. The wild yeast gives it a very sour aroma and taste, and the aftertaste is almost pure vinegar. It's a beer that even after getting used to, you may find yourself still wanting to spit it out occasionally. Not meant for chugging.

I, for one, and I'm the one who counts, loved it. Its ruby red color is entirely unique, and if you were closed-minded about beer, you'd say it was rotten sparkling cherry cider. But it's not. It's beer, and that is the beauty of it. I've had enough porters, IPAs, lagers, stouts and ales for a while. Lambics are a style completely off the map in the American beer culture, and while they wouldn't be the best idea for a once-a-week change of pace, every now and then they might hit the spot.

The Cantillon website boasts that the Kriek "tastes delicious with a big slice of brown bread with white cheese, radishes, onions and chives." It's true, radishes, onions and chives might have strong enough flavor to wipe the dry vinegar aftertaste off the roof of your mouth, but the aftertaste was part of the experience for me. Maybe now that I've taken one straight I'll feel free to dabble in food pairings next time. Next time I'm willing to fork over 12 bucks for a tiny bottle of rotten cherry vinegar, that is.

Beers of the Year: 10. Schneider Aventinus

2008-12-22T19:15:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Weissbierbrauerei G. Schneider & Sohn, Kelheim, Germany

Style: Weizen Bock

ABV: 8.2%

Rating: 4.5 stars

The one beer this year that tasted nothing like it appeared--in a good way. And it's probably the most well-hidden 8.2% ABV I had all year too. Though I haven't had many, I have no doubts that this is one of the best wheat beers in the world.

The taste is beyond complex--dark fruits, subtle pineapple and banana with a smooth texture unachievable by most dark beers. There's the typical caramel taste, but it's hidden beneath so many other flavors that it's hard to pinpoint. There are cloves, other spices and a general sweetness that is extremely pleasant. It would take a thorough tasting or a few of these to clearly define even half of its characteristics. Drinking a few would be possible, too, because it's so delightful, but I have a feeling the alcohol content would hit you hard after a couple.

I knew I would like most of the beers to come on this list, but this one was a shot in the dark that surprised me more than any other in 2008. I'm sure it will be a recurring feeling throughout this top ten, but I want one of these right now pretty badly.

Best of 2008: Year in ReBrew

2008-12-21T10:34:00.004-06:00

Tomorrow I'll dive into my ten best beers of the year, but today I'll dish out some category-specific awards as an appetizer. There were plenty of beers I loved this year, some I'd had before, some I hadn't. I tried to reserve the top ten spots for beers I had not had prior to 2008, with a couple exceptions. I had a hard time settling on ten favorites, especially after creating a rule that the same brewery wouldn't be represented more than once. So those beers that just missed the cut or got edged out on a technicality will have their day now.

The Classics

These are beers that I've had plenty of times and never disappoint, but didn't make the splash that the new-to-me gems did.

Guinness: an entirely unique beer, and one you can have a few of

Bell's Two Hearted Ale: the little microbrew that could has amassed wide popularity, and it's well-deserved

Fuller's ESB: still the best bitter on the planet

Samuel Smith's Oatmeal Stout: like drinking a cookie

Anchor Porter: my favorite Anchor beer, a very approachable porter

Best of the Hoppies

I've made no secrets that my favorite beers are ones loaded with hops. Dry-hopped, wet-hopped, Cascades, Centennials, Columbias, Sterlings, you name it.

Southern Tier Unearthly and Hoppe: at 8% and 11%, these beers get it done

Great Divide Titan IPA: perhaps the best non-imperial/double IPA

Avery the Maharaja Imperial IPA: blown away by my first imperial IPA

Tyranena Hop Whore: Hoppiest beer on this list

Struise Mikkeller (Elliot Brew): a collaboration between two of Europe's best breweries

Random Awards

Best Aroma: Two Brothers Cane and Ebel. Red rye beer with Thai palm sugar uses Summit hops and is dry-hopped with Simcoe. After opening the bottle I thought this could be the best beer of the year. Was really good, but not as good as the smell indicated.

Best Local Draught Staple: Summit EPA. Can find this almost anywhere in the Twin Cities and it's something almost every beer drinker can enjoy.

Best Twin Cities Brewpub Beer: Plenty of options here: Barley Johns in New Brighton, Great Waters in St. Paul, Herkimer, Rock Bottom and Town Hall in Minneapolis. The nod here goes to Town Hall's Masala Mama IPA, which has a more subtle citrus flavor, but a huge dry pine finish.

Best Holiday Beer: Anchor Christmas 2008. Gets the edge over Rogue's Santa's Private Reserve because of its unique aroma and flavor: dark deep fruits, almost like a mincemeat pie in a glass.

Best Summer Beer: Surly Bitter Brewer. Quenching and chuggable with a few hops thrown in. Really smooth.

Best Label: Tie between Bell's Hell Hath No Fury and Blanche de Bruxells of Brasserie Lefabvre.

The Skunk List: 1. Michelob Ultra Tuscan Orange Grapefruit

2008-12-18T10:34:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Anheuser-Busch, St. Louis, Missouri

Style: Fruit Beer

ABV: 4.2%

Rating: .5 stars

We've finally come to the worst beer of the year, and it's a real treat. The most insulting beer I tasted this year, and I don't see any on the horizon that could touch it. I troubles me that there are two other flavors of this beer--the lime cactus and pomegranate raspberry varieties are actually rated lower at ratebeer.com. Much like LaCrosse Light, it hurts my brain just typing about this beverage.

Let's clear the air: I would never, under any circumstances, buy this beer with the assumption that it may taste decent. Or even average. That's not on my radar. I bought this beer simply because I wanted to see how awful it could be. Let me tell you, it overshot even my loftiest garbage expectations. I knew it was bad when the clerk at the liquor store, a young woman mind you, encouraged me to put it back on the shelf. I've seen Phillips tequila go without warning, and that, for my money, is the worst thing I've ever put in my mouth. This beer is really that bad.

It's insulting on many levels, the first being that it just tastes horrible. Its low alcohol content and ridiculously low amount of calories make it so. This debuted at the tail end of the low-carb, low-calorie craze, so the demand was there. It also came out during this weird Tuscan obsession we all seemed to be going through, which is another puzzling story altogether. Why not capitalize on both? Tuscan orange grapefruit? Really? Who's buying that? Wow, did Anheuser-Busch load up on grapefruits and oranges from Tuscany? I've gotta try this! It's disgusting. This has less flavor than club soda. There is no grapefruit. There is no orange. There is no Tuscany. (On a side note, there's no Tuscany in Pizza Hut's bacon mac-n-cheese either.) All this beer has is a small amount of calories and some stomach-filling liquid. If you're counting calories, drink some water. If you're going for flavor, buy a vitamin water. If you want to get a little tipsy, drink something hard. If you want to puke, have this so-called beer.

The Skunk List: 2. City LaCrosse Light

2008-12-17T20:20:00.007-06:00

Brewery: City Brewery, LaCrosse, Wisconsin

Style: Pale Lager

ABV: 4.7%

Rating: .5 stars

Very hard to find even a picture of this beer. So bad I'm not sure where to begin.

First, I'll start by saying that if this was a list based purely on taste (you could argue that it should be), this would be numbers 10 thru 1. Looking back on the 275+ beers I had this year, nothing jumps into my mind faster than Lax Lite when I think of crap in a can. In fact, after those sentences, I need to take a quick mental break before typing any more.

Let's start here: I had just consumed twelve, count them, twelve, cans of Blatz Lite. Now, this sets the bar quite low, seeing that only Wisconsinites and desperate poor Minnesotans participating in a case race drink Blatz. After the binge, I poured myself a glass of LaCrosse Light. Keep in mind how drunk I was at this point. I COULD NOT FINISH THE LACROSSE. Not only could I not finish it, I could barely choke down a sip. At the time: "Honestly could only gulp down one sip. Have to count it, though, because I'll probably never go for it again."

For a man who's had every skunky beer Minnesota and Wisconsin have to offer, those are big words. Think of every negative adjective in the books and this one had it: flat, face-clenching, spit-out-able--this beer created new horrible beer adjectives. I almost want to have another one right now just to remember how horrible it is. After all, how can you tell the good ones if you have no reference for awful?

The Skunk List: 3. Krasniy Vostok Bogemskoe (Bogemia Pale Beer)

2008-12-16T19:19:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Pivzavod AO Krasniy Vostok (Efes Russia)

Style: Malt Liquor

ABV: 8.4%

Rating: .5 stars

Can this even be called a beer? Here's the ratebeer definition of a malt liquor: "Strong, alcoholic-tasting, often poorly made strong lagers. Esters, fusels and other products of undiluted high-gravity brewed beers are often commonplace. Properly served in the 40oz bottle with accompanying brown paper bag." This is a 40 in a beer bottle, essentially.

This explains so much.

Without question, the worst job of masking the alcohol in the history of adult beverages. Of course, it does come from Russia, so that gives us some insight. I really can't say much more than that about it. I get the feeling that this one might be available at a wider-selection beer store, so if you see it, go for it. Try it. It won't cost you too much, and you and your friends can gather round to see what the fuss is about. Maybe then you'll understand my absolute lack of words for this one.

The Skunk List: 4. Indian River Shoal Draft Pale Ale

2008-12-16T19:06:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Florida Beer Company, Melbourne, Florida

Style: American Pale Ale

ABV: 3.7%

Rating: .5 stars

The first clue is the 3.7% ABV. That's pitifully low. Bud Light, by comparison, is 4.2%. This, my friends, is too close to gas station 3.2 beer for my comfort.

I vividly remember the night I first tasted this beer. We were lucky enough to have company, so 1) I could here various descriptions of this awful brew and 2) I didn't have to drink it all myself. From the journal: "Tastes like sewage. Of the non-lite, non-ice, non-mega brewery beers I've ever had, this is the worst. I hesitate to give it half a star." I kept the label to remember the horror.

I received two different beers from the Florida Beer Company (shady, right?) from my beer-of-the-month club, and have never seen any of their offerings in a local liquor store. Clearly for good reason. It should be brought into question how a "microbrew beer of the month club" would even steer itself toward this brewery. At last count, this beer had been rated 18 times on ratebeer.com and is nowhere to be found on beeradvocate.com. Very fishy.

The Skunk List: 5. Samuel Adams Cherry Wheat

2008-12-14T09:27:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Boston Beer Company, Boston, Massachusetts

Style: Fruit Beer

ABV: 5.2%

Rating: .5 star

Sometimes the non-beer drinkers give the most dead-on assessments of a beer, and that was the case for this one. Kristie, my wife, who despises all kinds of beer, usually gets to sample mine in case she has something brilliant or funny to bring to my attention. With the cherry wheat, she was able to pick up a flavor that was nowhere near the forefront of my mind: urinal cakes. Once she said it, though, I couldn't get it out of my mind.

So does having a beer hater's opinion in your ear alter your opinion of a beer? You might say it does, but I've loved dozens of beers that Kristie would have spit out if I'd let her. It would be like taking marital advice seriously from Elizabeth Taylor. So I feel strongly that this beer would have made this list even without the urinal cake epiphany.

I've previously stated my enjoyment of the sour cherry kriek taste, and this cherry is on the complete opposite end of the spectrum--sweet but dull, heavy and smothering. It's sticky in your mouth and the coating stays for a while. I've been known to compare beers to cough syrup, but I won't slap that label on this one. It simply isn't that good, especially from a brewery that is very visible and up front about its ingenuity and high quality. This one doesn't fit the "Brewmaster's Collection" title they've given it.

The Skunk List: 6. Northern Premium Light

2008-12-13T09:32:00.006-06:00

Brewery: Cold Spring Brewery, Cold Spring, Minnesota

Style: Pilsner

ABV: ??

Rating: .5 star

Looking back, this could easily be ranked the worst beer of the year, but as a low-carb light beer, that's predictable. So putting it at the top of the list would be boring. That said, Northern Premium Light was notably worse than even the worst beastly lights out there.

At its original time of rating, I called it "the most tasteless beer to date." That was in August, and if my memory serves me correctly, I would still describe it that way. In fact, the brewer's website describes it this way: "This beer is a lightly hopped beer with low body and a pale golden color." Lightly hopped? Low body? Pale golden color? Not exactly the best PR work here. And no, you can't buy a single bottle of this beer, though I've paid more for an individual bottle many times than I had to pay for an entire case of this. There's your sign.

Unfortunately, I had to offer this swill to my father-in-law after an evening of manly labor, something I was admittedly embarrassed doing. When I asked him what he thought of it, he said, "It's cold." That's really the best you can do. There are, as in the case of Harbin, plenty of drinkers out there that can do a much more eloquent job of describing these beers, and I strongly encourage you to read a sampling of them at ratebeer.com. Since this is a year-end recap, I don't have all the flavors fresh in my mind, so I have to rely on my initial notes and hazy memory. In this instance, I was as terse as possible in my original rating. So again, I'll let the raters take over.

heemer77: "Wow, this pours out of the can with a pale yellow that is not even straw. It’s like looking in a trough at a stadium and seeing the water washing away the urine. White scum of a head on top. The aroma is light vomit and corn flakes. There is also some petroleum based aroma, like motor oil. The taste is light corn flakes with a metallic finish."

jpm30: "Strange, unappealing nose, even for a light beer, that apple juice scent that so many Gluek beers have, corn syrup, metallic fusel alcohol. Active carbonation without the light body, more medium, watery feeling. Unpleasant taste, weak, watery sour apple juice, the thinnest of sweet pale malts, hints of boiled sweet corn, used up, tasteless hops, finishes with a big taste of metal. There is also an artificial sweetener twang in the aftertaste, making you want to wash your mouth out."

asedzie: "Aroma is rotting compost and a little bit of cigarette smoke. Flavor is light diacetyl with rotten vegetables. Watery palate. Putrid. Can’t think of any redeeming qualities to this beer."

The Skunk List: 7. Harbin

2008-12-13T09:15:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Harbin

Style: Pale Lager

ABV: 4.8%

Rating: .5 star

Follow this lineage: Harbin Brewery was founded in 1900 by a Russian man. This beer contains European and Chinese Qindao Dahua hops and a German malt. The brewery is owned by Anheuser-Busch, who aquired it in a nasty battle with Miller. Put it all together, and you have one crappy beer. One that I originally tabbed as the flattest beer I'd ever tasted. A statement I won't back down from.

As this list continues, I'm realizing how hard it is to continually describe the qualities of a horrible beer. It's just an agonizing process to go over again. Like most Asian beers, it seems the label and packaging is more important than the taste, and now that i know they use Chinese hops it makes more sense. I don't like Chinese hops. So, since I'm tired of trying to conjur up metaphors for the invisible flavors, I'll let the most recent raters of Harbin at ratebeer.com do the work for me.

jerohen: "General lack of flavour..."

yesyouam: "It has a funky aroma, like vegetables, melon, alcohol and rotten fruit...It has a fusel flavor. It burns my nose...It was a challenge to finish this beer. It comes in a fancy bottle, though."

Dogbrick: "Nothing redeeming about this beer, it makes Tsingtao interesting by comparison."

badgerben: "Aroma of rice, dusted with moldy hops. Corny taste, finishing with a drop of skunk."

So I'm not the only one who thinks it's skunky.

The Skunk List: 8. Anchor Small Beer

2008-12-11T13:51:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Anchor Brewing, San Francisco, California

Style: Small Beer

ABV: 3.3%

Rating: 1 star

This was my first real 'wow, I guess I know nothing about beer' moment. I usually quite enjoy Anchor beers; Steam is as drinkable as it gets and their porter is one of the best out there. This one, a new find for me, was a can't miss, I assumed. And cheap! Less than three bucks for a big bottle of Anchor beer was an unbeatable bargain. I found out why upon the first sip.

It had that cold, carbonated sting that made it only possible to take one small gulp at a time. You know how it's hard to chug a cold Mountain Dew because it has too big of a bite on the throat? This was the same way, except that instead of limey sugar this one tasted like a post-kegger mix cup or all the random half cups of beer left in the house. And with an ABV of 3.3%, what's the point.

Turns out a small beer, which are very few in number these days, is created by using the runoff from a different, stronger beer. In this case, Anchor's Foghorn Barleywine is the initial beer. Once that beer has been formulated, the remains are spruced up a bit and turned into this travesty. It is called, generously by the brewer, a bitter. This is more bitter than bitter. It's an orange peel that's been soaked in keg water for a few days bitter. In fact, the only reason this got one star, upon reflection, was the name on the bottle.

The Skunk List: 9. Minnesota's Brew

2008-12-10T17:59:00.004-06:00

Brewery: City Brewery, LaCrosse, Wisconsin

Style: Pale Lager

ABV: 5%

Rating: 1 Star

This was one of those once-a-summer, back corner of the cooler kind of finds. Had to buy it simply because of the can (the one on the left in the picture). From the journal: "Probably deserves half a star, but I was feeling the skunk at the time." The can alone probably propelled it to the one-star level, and I seem to remember a couple friends and I struggling to finish off a six pack.

There isn't much description possible here--it was a gross, unflavorful beer that you'd need to have far too many of to get to a point where it would pass as drinkable. Maybe that's the test; how many beers needed for drinkability. There weren't enough in this six pack. The last rating on ratebeer.com, my site for beer research, says this: "Have 2 of these saved for when the Vikings reach the Super Bowl someday." Enough said. I guess tha's what happens when a beer called Minnesota's Brew is actually brewed in Wisconsin

The Skunk List: 10. Kronenbourg 1664

2008-12-09T19:17:00.004-06:00

Brewery: Brasseries-Kronenbourg, Strasbourg, France

Style: Pale Lager

ABV: 5%

Rating: 1 star

Had this many times in my few months in London, mostly because I was poor and it was cheap. It's easy to see why. Not unlike most European lagers, your Peronis, Carlsbergs or Amstels, Kronenbourg has those unquenching bitter hops that usually taste more like river water than beer.

If it's cold, it's hard to choke down because the combination of the massive carbonation and the previously mentioned bitterness is too much for one throat to handle. If it's warm, it gets flat and slimy. If it's in the middle, it just tastes like lukewarm crap. Unless you too are on an indefinite beer quest, leave the Kronenbourg 1664 on the shelf.

The Skunk List: Worst Beers of 2008

2008-12-08T18:06:00.003-06:00

Since we're hitting the close of the year, and since I love ranking things, I thought I could share some of the dozens of horrible beer experiences I've had this year. By my latest count, I've tried 247 beers this year, and tasted 26 more home brews or samples that I couldn't officially tally. Of those 247, 46 have received 1.5 stars or less on my five-star scale. Moral: when you're starting a lifelong beer project, there's going to be some severe skunk along the way.

Thankfully, I've gotten many of the classic skunk out of the way. Anheuser-Busch and Miller (Somehow Coors only sent one beer to this list) paved a new trail of putridity, but it's no fun to put Miller High Life Lite and Bud Ice in a worst-of list. So, barring one extraordinary exception, the 20 brews from the Beasts of Beer simply get an honorable mention nod. And here they are, with additional tasting notes from my original journal injected where I feel compelled.

Anheuser-Busch

Michelob Marzen: "If I bought the sampler and had three of these, two would never get consumed."
Michelob Pale Ale: "Says it's dry-hopped--possibly with garbage."
Michelob Golden Draft Light
Bud Light: "Honestly, not the worst I've had. Got me through a boring wedding."
Budweiser: "Haven't had many Buds lately. Not the worst."
Bud Light Lime: "Deserves no more ink than this."
Busch Light: "As far as mega-lites go, I like it."
Budweiser Select: "Yikes. Went from a 1 star to a .5 real quick.
Landshark Lager: "The domestic Corona."

Miller

Milwaukee's Best Light: "Pretty much as gross as it gets."
Miller Lite Amber: "Tastes like Miller Lite. Stay away."
Miller Lite: "You know the drill. For beer pong only."
Blatz Light: "Quite possibly the worst thing I've ever tasted."
Red Dog: "Only decent after 12 Blatz Lights."
Miller Genuine Draft 64: "This is NOT a beer. Tastes like river water. An embarrassment to men."
Special Export Light: "The original case race beer. It's bad, but not Blatz bad."
Miller High Life: "Champagne of beers only tolerable after winning softball league."
Hamm's Special Light: "Stunningly, not bad. A shock."

Coors

Coors Light: "The worst of the lights."

There were some mega-brewery offers that limped to the two-star or above level, so I'll give some credit here for those efforts.

2 Star
Pabst Blue Ribbon, Miller. It was one of the first beers I rated, had to leave room for a basement.
Rolling Rock, Anheuser-Busch. Barely reaching the almost tolerable stage.
Michelob Amber Bock, Anheuser-Busch. "This is what people who think they like real beer drink. It's not real beer, it's crap."
George Killian's Irish Red, Coors. A decent representation of a style I don't care for.

2.5 Star:
Shock Top Belgian White, Anheuser-Busch. Not a good Belgian white, but a more drinkable beer than most A-B.
Blue Moon Harvest Moon Pumpkin Ale, Coors. Not a good pumpkin ale, but very drinkable.

3.5 Star:
Blue Moon, Coors. This was a great beer. In college. Has the sentimental value on its side.

Tomorrow I'll begin the real bottom ten in earnest. One a day.

Fall Brew Wrapup

2008-11-24T19:30:00.011-06:00

In the interest of time, I'm going to combine the rest of my fall brews into one post. If it's not obvious, this is because the rest of the fall stuff I sampled wasn't that great. Here we go.

Summit Oktoberfest

Brewery: Summit, St. Paul, Minnesota

Style: Oktoberfest/Marzen

ABV: 7.7%

Rating: 3.5 Stars

As you can tell by the alcohol content, this Oktoberfest packs a stronger punch than most. It's darker, creamier and frankly, more difficult to chug. I hate to be redundant, but honestly, how can all these beers claim to be in the Oktoberfest/Marzen category? They are so unalike. I'm not talking about subtle differences between pale ales here, the differences in these beers are vast, and could make someone regret buying a 12-pack because of confusion.

Yes, they call this an Oktoberfest. If you were to pick a season for this beer, I guess you could pick fall (the Winter Ale comes out a few weeks later), but I'd call it something other than Oktoberfest. OK, maybe I'm bitter because Summit denied me a job. But I do like this beer in general. I just think the categorizing is a bit of a stretch. In my notes, the only meaningful descriptive word I had for this one was spicy. Next.

Hacker Pschorr Original Oktoberfest

Brewery: Paulaner, Munich, Germany

Style: Oktoberfest/Marzen

ABV: 5.8%

Rating: 2.5 Stars

A traditional Marzen. Golden verging on amber in color, with flavor characteristics similar to a German pilsner. Has a bigger kick, though only noticeable after a couple. I have to admit, I had this one after the Summit, which I thought was a more traditional Oktoberfest at the time, and was slightly disappointed with the result. Looking back, I probably slighted Hacker Pschorr a bit. You can't question the original, can you?

Goose Island Harvest Ale

Brewery: Goose Island, Chicago, Illinois

Style: ESB

ABV: 5.6%

Rating: 3.5 Stars

Reliable sources pegged this one as a Surly clone. I didn't taste the same beer apparently. Though I wouldn't have IDed it as an ESB (I don't like many other than Fuller's), I certainly wouldn't have mistaken it for a Surly. Has good round flavor, with floral hops and a nice dry finish, but is far less aggressive than I need a beer to be. I enjoyed it, and could probably have half a dozen in a night's work, but I'm past the days of pursuing quantity over quality.

Leinenkugel's Oktoberfest

Brewery: Leinenkugel's, Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin

Style: Oktoberfest/Marzen

ABV: 5.1%

Rating: 1 Star

An attempt at a traditional Oktoberfest. I would like to give Leinie's the benefit of the doubt on this one--maybe it was a bad keg--but I just can't do it. This was garbage. Flat, no zip, no flavor, a leave-it-on-the-side-of-the-road beer all around. Not sure why they even bother.

Mendocino Oktoberfest

Brewery: Mendocino, Hopland, California

Style: Oktoberfest/Marzen

ABV: 6.1%

Rating: 2 Stars

Gets the nod over Leinie's simply because you're getting 1% higher alcohol content. Otherwise, there's just as little reason to touch this. From the notes (pre-Leinie's): "Worst Oktoberfest I've had this year. Flat taste and very bitter." Maybe I'm just not a fan of the style.

Southern Tier Pumking

2008-11-19T17:45:00.003-06:00

Brewery: Southern Tier, Lakewood, New York

Style: Pumpkin Ale

ABV: 9%

Rating: 3.5 Stars

If you asked me to guess the color of this beer before I poured it, I would have gone with a deep mahogany or a burnt sienna. Something rich and hearty, with a prominent clove or cinnamon scent.

Instead, this one comes out near-neon orange. And this is not meant to be a smells-like-your-grandma's-kitchen pumpkin beer. This is meant to be a smells-like-pumpkin-guts beer.

You have to hand it to Southern Tier, so far my favorite brewery of the year. When they do a style, they go balls out, pumping as much true flavor into their beers as possible. I'd hate to see their jacked-up version of a pale lager.

So, there is major pumpkin aroma from the sizzle of the popped cap. There also is a subtle banana bread smell, which confused, but intrigued me. It smells pretty darn good. And it tastes pretty good too, for a while. One bomber (22 oz) of this is almost too much to handle, and I even split this one. The pure pumpkin, as opposed to a sweeter, more rich-flavored pumpkin ale, leaves a fairly hefty taste in your mouth, one that you can't exactly wash down with another swig.

Many of the ST offers I'd recommend whole-heartedly for mass consumption. Many others, however, I'd encourage you to try once, share it with a group, and leave it for the next curious drinker. This one falls into the latter category. It was unlike any other pumpkin beer I've had, and is worth trying, but it is so strange that I'm unwilling to say it's uniqueness was for the better.

Sierra Nevada Wet Hop Harvest Ale

2008-11-18T17:54:00.002-06:00

Brewery: Sierra Nevada, Chico, California

Style: American IPA

ABV: 6.7%

Rating: 3 stars

A wet hop, or fresh hop, beer, is one made with hops that are never dried. They go straight from the plant to the pot in their fresh form. It's like getting a fresh, never frozen burger from Wendy's. Or maybe, in Sierra Nevada's case, like getting one from an In-N-Out Burger. A Wendy's fresh beef burger might be more like a Budweiser wet hop ale.

Well, the fresh hops come through. This batch of Harvest Ale is Sierra Nevada's 12th run, and they know what they're doing. The hops are big and sticky up front, with a delightful pine-ness. However, the back end of the swallow wasn't quite as pleasant. The piney flavors turn a bit brown, and the heavy end isn't what I was expecting. So this is an IPA with a backbone, they say. With some substance. Well I guess I like it beter without the substance. Just give me the wet hops.

SurlyFest

2008-11-15T11:05:00.006-06:00

Brewery: Surly, Brooklyn Center, Minnesota

Style: Rye Beer

ABV: 5.5%

Rating: 4 Stars

This is a first in a series of fall beer dissection. The fall beer season, like the real season, is quite short, and the Oktoberfests and Harvests are quickly giving way to Winter Ales and Holiday brews. I initially thought I'd combine them all into one mega-posting in a sort of report card style. I gave grades and everything. However, the practicality of that quickly evaporated when I realized who was at the computer controlls. I'll do them one at a time. Anyway, about the beer.

A very Surly take on an Oktoberfest. Really, there isn't much of a link between this beer and any other Oktoberfest I've tried. From the cracking of the can, it smells like a Surly--wild hops, and this one's got a spicy rye scent with a bit more malty backbone than the other lighter Surly options.

So how to describe this beer to someone unfamiliar with the Surly scent without using beer jargon. Well, I guess that's something I'll have to work on. Actually, I don't really even know what jargon I'd use here, other than restating that I wouldn't mistake the instant hoppiness for any other brewer. It's certainly not a deep, heavy beer you might associate with fall. It pours a deep orange-red with a obvious presence of carbonation. You don't see a glass of this and think you're in for a throat-coating. You know it's going down less sticky than some of its fall counterparts.

I guess I can admit this; I would have no idea this was considered a rye beer without doing some recon work. Surly is sneaky--they mess around with established styles, but dance far off the floor. This is not an Oktoberfest, and any message board-poster who says it's "a nice and interesting take on the style" is just lying. (I realize I said precisely that just two paragraphs ago. I'm trying to cut back on message board reading.) It smells, tastes and fills your stomach not like a fall beer, but like a summer poolside one. I'm not sure Surly can do it any other way other than to escalate to a fully-fledged stout. I can't complain, because it's that Surly smell I love. Thinking about the smell makes me want one.

Cantillon Kriek 100% Lambic

2008-11-10T17:57:00.004-06:00

Brewery: Brasserie Cantillon, Brussels, Belgium

Style: Lambic

ABV: 5%

Rating: 4.5 Stars

After enjoying the Flat Earth wild ale, I knew I had to take the plunge and try a real Belgian lambic. Cantillon has brewed this beer the same way, in the same barrels, for over 100 years, and is a well-known name. I figured it was a good one to start with, though at $10.99, it was the most expensive 11 ounces I've purchased yet.

Again, this is a fruit beer, and one that is fermented with live bacteria instead of the more sanitary yeast. Kriek is cherry-flavored, but not like cherry Jolly Ranchers. The wild yeast gives it a very sour aroma and taste, and the aftertaste is almost pure vinegar. It's a beer that even after getting used to, you may find yourself still wanting to spit it out occasionally. Not meant for chugging.

I, for one, and I'm the one who counts, loved it. Its ruby red color is entirely unique, and if you were closed-minded about beer, you'd say it was rotten sparkling cherry cider. But it's not. It's beer, and that is the beauty of it. I've had enough porters, IPAs, lagers, stouts and ales for a while. Lambics are a style completely off the map in the American beer culture, and while they wouldn't be the best idea for a once-a-week change of pace, every now and then they might hit the spot.

The Cantillon website boasts that the Kriek "tastes delicious with a big slice of brown bread with white cheese, radishes, onions and chives." It's true, radishes, onions and chives might have strong enough flavor to wipe the dry vinegar aftertaste off the roof of your mouth, but the aftertaste was part of the experience for me. Maybe now that I've taken one straight I'll feel free to dabble in food pairings next time. Next time I'm willing to fork over 12 bucks for a tiny bottle of rotten cherry vinegar, that is.

Flat Earth Extra Medium

2008-11-07T20:11:00.012-06:00

Brewery: Flat Earth, St. Paul, Minnesota

Style: American Wild Ale

ABV: 5.2%

Rating: 4 Stars

So, what exactly is an American Wild Ale, or Sour Ale? I'm not real sure myself, since this was the first one I've ever had. Found it on tap at Buster's on 28th in South Minneapolis, and after having it was so intrigued that I had to research the style and this specific offering. Turns out the information is fairly limited, and unfortunately, pretty jargony.

An American Wild Ale is beer that uses one of three types of wild yeast or bacteria. The style became popular when American brewers tried to recreate traditional Belgian brews called Lambics. Lambics were spontaneously fermented by wild yeast that was only available in a certain region of the country. The result was an unmistakable taste: dry, fruity and very acidic.

This beer fits the bill. The nose (I'll use a wine term because the smell was so...winey) was similar to a sharp, sour cherry cider. Only, the cider has been hiding behind the baking soda in your fridge for a few years. It smells like rank, fermented cider, which is not far off from what it actually is: rank, fermented beer.

The taste, however, was quite pleasant. It sparkled like ginger ale, soured the mouth like a crab apple and filled the mouth with a handful of fruity flavors. If you didn't know it was beer, and it was your first sour ale experience, you might think it was cider, if not for the faint malt presence toward the end of the swallow. The description at Buster's also mentioned a small whiskey presence, and though I wouldn't have noticed it without the forewarning, it was a nice contrast at the back end of the gulp.

The Buster's bio also claimed this beer, of which Flat Earth brewed only three barrels, had a "slight inner city funk" to it. There was definitely funk, but I thought that could be attributed to the wild bacteria. Just me.

If the purpose of this project is to discover and sample every different style of beer available, this was a good step. It's a big leap for a so-called beer lover to admit that fruit has a place in beerdom, and I had been hesitant to accept the large amount of highly-rated lambics on beer message boards. This tasting will help. It may not be the best American Wild Ale out there, and I'm certainly not the one to decide, but it's good enough to make me want to try more.

Surly Darkness

2008-11-06T21:43:00.005-06:00

Brewery: Surly, Brooklyn Center, Minnesota

Style: Russian Imperial Stout

ABV: 10.3%

Rating: 4.5 Stars

This is the big one. The beer that launched Surly's popularity. Currently ranked 6th on RateBeer's world list. By popular ratings standards, this is the best beer I've ever had.

On Surly's D-Day (stolen from history textbooks), a few of these bottles were distributed, but I wasn't lucky enough to get one. Plus, though I'd like to, I couldn't rationalize spending $100 on a six pack anyway. Luckily, Darkness is more commonly found on tap at bars in the Twin Cities, and The Blue Nile was my ticket.

It's not hard to find Imperial Stouts these days, and Darkness has similarities to many of them--pitch black color (the name isn't tongue-in-cheek), heavy molasses and burnt caramel smells. You see a glass of this stuff and you've pretty much mapped out your next hour. It's a nightcap.

Unlike most stouts, though, Darkness is incredibly drinkable. Almost guzzleable, and dangerously so. If you allowed yourself to, you could pound out a few of these in a three-hour bender, and pay for it in the morning. It's scary good. Darkness doesn't burn your stomach as much as warm it, and the coating of your entire mouth is heavenly. Now, I'm not the biggest Imperial Stout guy in the world, but it's tough to quibble with anything about Darkness. An incredible accomplishment.

Surly Smoke

2008-11-06T13:46:00.009-06:00

Brewery: Surly, Brooklyn Center, Minnesota

Style: Oak Aged Smoked Baltic Porter

ABV: 9.45%

Rating: 4 Stars

The waitress at the Blue Nile offered us samples of this limited release--the barrel was getting down to the bottom. Had to accept, this one doesn't get bottled and is rarely found in bars.

I'd never had a smoked beer before, let alone one aged in barrels, so this was new territory for me. Kristie, my beer-hating wife, got a sample too, and her off-the-top-of-her-head thoughts are more eloquent than mine: "Smells like you took a glass of Guinness and you lit it on fire, then you licked out the dregs of the ashy glass."

Indeed, it tastes smoky. No carbonation at all in this one, and it had a very nice thin mouthfeel, unlike the Darkness, which I had later. OK, I promised I wouldn't use jargon, but I enjoy the word mouthfeel. Probably doesn't exist in regular conversation. The smoke flavor pretty much overpowers all other flavors, but I thought it was quite sweet in general. I would never had guessed it was 9.5% alcohol, and knowing that now explains why I felt the way I did afterward.

It's probably too late to get your hands on this one, but come next fall, find a beer festival somewhere in the Midwest and chances are Surly will be back with it. It's a unique and enjoyable beer.

Bell's Hopslam

2008-11-05T19:32:00.014-06:00

Brewery: Bell's, Kalamazoo, Michigan

Style: Double India Pale Ale

ABV: 10%

Rating: 5 Stars

This is a beer I had been coveting since summer, having started my beer journey after its availability ended. I thought I would have to wait until next January to try it, as it's only available for a month and a half at the beginning of the year. However, I was delighted to see it on the bottle list at the Blue Nile, an Ethiopian restaurant in Minneapolis. More beer from there later. Why was this beer so sought after? For one, Bell's is one of the best breweries in the country, and its wide availability in Minnesota has allowed me to sample many of their outstanding options. Secondly, Imperial IPAs are without question my favorite style of beer to date. You get the intense hop taste on the front, with the monster alcohol kick at the back. You can usually sip them, enjoy the taste, and feel it at the end. True, a Hopslam is gonna set you back $7 or so, as most DIPAs will, but you get the equivalent of two beers in one tasty snifter.

So, did Hopslam deliver?

The color of the beer is the first key. This one was that beautiful deep amber--darker than the bug in the rock amber--sort of like a harvest moon color. That's a good sign. It's a color that just looks enticing.

The aroma was phenomenal. Yes, there were the immediate hops that one would expect from a beer of this variety, and yes, there were citrusy notes that again, are expected. But there was a sweetness there as well. The beer is brewed with honey, and being able to find that scent in a powerful beer says a lot about the brewing. It smelled balanced.

The taste. I'll refrain from going into any flowershop or produce aisle metaphors here, but my first contact with Hopslam was as good as any I've had. Again, the honey is crucial, as it balances out the roof-of-the-mouth dryness that comes with these bitter hops. It sticks to the inside of your mouth, but is wiped away by the sweet honey. Magical.

Without question, Bell's Hopslam was one of the three or four best beers I've had. I look forward to buying it in bulk come January 2009.

Where to start a beer blog.

2008-11-05T13:23:00.000-06:00

I guess this blog truly started in February, 2008, when I had decided to chronicle every different beer I would try from that point forward. I chose a small hard-bound journal as the chronicling body, which I've toted with me everywhere I've gone in the past nine months. During that span, I've sampled 249 different imports, microbrews, mega-domestic-lites and homebrews, and each one can be found somewhere in my red journal's lined pages.

I intended for this project to be only for my knowledge and use, so that I could track the progression of my beer taste buds as I go through life. I noted where and when I had the beer for the first time, whether it was from a bottle, can, draught or other source, and where I had it. I gave tidy, yet descriptive, critiques of each beer using language that made sense to me. No IBU's or hop specifications here. I used a five-star rating system. (I tossed around cheesy ratings thoughts like using mugs instead of stars, but that was a bit too much. And tiny stars are much easier to draw.)

People (OK, a couple of the dozen people who even know this journal exists) encouraged me to expand the project. Why keep it to yourself? Isn't there a bigger vehicle for such and endeavor? Wouldn't you like to store the information someplace more permanent than a flimsy journal? And being the twice-failed blogger that I am, I knew it was only a matter of time before I'd succumb to their deafening pleas. So, 263 days after the birth of this project, here we are.